Songs Of A Brokenhearted Soul

★Balladeer's Whim

I couldn't sleep, my eyes were as tired as my hopeless mind thinking in cycles.
I could hear the utter silence that the night muses through my ears, it reverberates like echoes from the high pitched cries of the burning souls in the underworld, so distinct, yet so much deafening at the same time.
I forced to shut my eyes, a fatal mistake I've done as the photograph of my untold love towards her opened like captured memories, flashing like they were so true, so real in my own world.
I writhed in my bed, my soul did the same.

The golden arrow from Eros' quiver was loosened to purposely torture my sleeping heart. "I did nothing," I exclaimed. "Oh, you did something very terrible. . . Now take the price for stealing glances over the beautiful gal you admire." Eros chuckled softly. "Was that a sin?" I asked. "A grave mistake, Indeed." He mumbled and then I realized I was just talking with myself, inside my restless mind.

Was it a sin to probe her smile? To set her as an inspiration everyday? To love her at my own risk at my own world?
"A grave mistake, Indeed." I could still hear Eros' voice teasing me.
It is indeed a grave mistake, I could hear my subconsciousness agreeing. Who was envious over everything that revolves around her? Who was affected when something is happening to her? Who was writhing in pain secretly when she's hurt? It is you. A sharp knife suddenly pierced my heart that I could feel the pang of agony seeping to my bones, the taints it brings send numbness to my body that I feel like growing cold.

I urged to shut my mind again, but just like a balloon filled with overpressure, it exploded spilling the truths and lies as the two intertwined like a helix. "Do not push yourself too much. Oh, my sweet coward lad, all you need to do is confess," my subconsciousness hectored. A trickle of tear drops from the corner of my eye. "If I confess I'll be doomed for eternal. Worse, she might abhor me." "Coward! You won't know until you try! You short minded dolt. Stop over thinking, stop the cycle of ifs before it kills your sanity. My sweet, remember this, 'If you love someone go tell it to them, because everyday is a new chance for them to find someone else'."

"I know." Heartache has bitten me, calming me like a friendly tranquilizer singing me to sleep while my heart couldn't help denying the fact that I love her.