Chapter 15

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Summer was a really nice girl, I got to know her too. She was really lovely. We used to talk about a lot of things, and we became close friends. But it was hard not to mention Ethan in our conversations, since he was a dear friend to me, he was more like my best friend. It is true that she has moved on, but there were still parts of her that missed him. And my job was to comfort her, as I did for Emily. But there was still a question all of them wondered about: Why haven’t I fallen for him?

Ethan was very close to my heart. We were best friends. He was always there for me, supporting me and putting me in high spirits whenever I am not in a good mood. We didn’t use to talk very often, because we lived in two distant countries. But this didn’t affect our friendship. I knew him by coincidence, he was my best friend’s cousin, she introduced him to me. At first, we were very formal, our conversations weren’t very numerous. But later, I got to know him well, and I found out what an amazing personality he had. It is true that he was arrogant, sarcastic, and a little cocky, but somehow I found it acceptable. It gave him a special charm, and I was really delightful to have him as a close friend. I liked the kind of relationship we had, we had a lot of fun together. I always enjoyed talking to him, he could make me laugh, make me smile, and erase my sorrow. He knew the key to me. He always encouraged me to enjoy my life, and live it the way I want. He always said that my life was boring, and he was right. My life wasn’t exciting at all, I was always busy with my studies and I didn’t find much time to enjoy it. On the other hand, he was living his life in the perfect way. I always kept in touch with his novelties, his life events, and his romantic stories as well. Most of my friends wondered if I had feelings for him, and most of the time I didn’t know what to say. Did I have any feelings for him?

         I had no idea, and I never knew how to respond. He was simply perfect, and any girl would want him. They said that he had always been kind to me, and Ethan wasn’t usually like this, he was more like sarcastic and sardonic. So being kind to me would absolutely make me fall for him. I always said that I love him, but not the way they all did. I loved him as a friend, as a very close friend actually. But is that the truth? Did I only see him like this, or that’s what I tried to convince myself with since I knew he was so out of my league. It is true that he is the kind of men that I want. In fact, I always picture my future husband like that, more like Ethan. I wanted him to be classy, steady, well-spoken, romantic, cultural…And the list is endless. I simply wanted him to be like Ethan, without his Forever-Bachelor lifestyle. That was the meaning of perfection in my terms. But why not him? Why not Ethan himself? That was the question they had all asked. Well, for me it was one of the impossibilities, it just can never happen, not in million years. I never talked to him about that, because I never thought it could be a good idea. Besides, what was I supposed to tell him? I wasn’t even sure that I have feelings for him. And I didn’t even try to know if I really do. I always thought that I can control my feelings. Because, the feeling grows only when you want it to, when you keep thinking of it. And as long as you are ignoring it and not trying to know if it is there in your heart or not, then you are safe. That was my theory. It didn’t work for a lot of people, but it did for me. I always thought that I am not good enough for him, I mean, I knew his girlfriends and they were all perfect. I just didn’t know why it didn’t work for so long between them. Sometimes, I express my jealousy whenever he’s talking about his romantic stories, but I don’t really know if I mean it or I just joke about it, either ways it gets considered as joking. He always said that I’m too innocent, but I’m sure that if he knew what runs in my head, he’d be sure that he was dead wrong.

Our friendship lasted ever since, we used to talk every once in a while, we kept in touch and we never forgot to check on each other. And even if we were apart, distance didn’t affect our friendship, but it made it stronger. I focused more on my studies considering that I was passing through an important phase that would define my future. As for him, he was having his glory age, he was living it up. Everything was going as usual, the same humdrum, until we got the chance to meet.

It was my graduating year. Finally, this whole studies period came to an end. Only few months before the end of the year, there was a conference some of the students were meant to attend. Luckily, I was on the list. But it wasn’t just an ordinary conference, it was in London. It was the first time I feel lucky. Finally, I was going to London. Only the idea made me excited. But the best thing was to know that it wasn’t just a chance for me to visit London, but a chance to meet him as well. In that week, he had something to do there. It had to do with his job, it was more like a “doctors” meeting. I wasn’t sure I knew what it was about. Anyway, I didn’t even bother because I was too busy being happy about this wonderful experience that I had no idea what it would lead to.

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