Spitting Image • TFC 3.0 • l.t. au

Introduction

When you want time to fly, it always goes slow. When you want to savour the moment, it flies by faster than you can imagine. Maybe, just maybe, it's how someone perceives it.

Watching someone you love get hurt, hurts you as well. Only thinking about the pain they're growing through is painful but knowing you can't do anything about it? That's ten times worse.

How many times has your parents told you that they'd be willing to sacrifice anything for you to not get hurt? Have you scraped your knee, your mum kissing it and tell you the pain will be gone in no time? Or when you lost your first tooth and eating ice cream was the greatest feeling in the world?

For children, the smallest things mean so much to them. When you get older, it takes so much more to take the pain away. The older you get, the more impossible pain feels like. We were all children once. The smallest papercut felt like the world was ending but we knew nothing about the real world. We had no idea the pains we feel as a child is only a stepping stone for the pains life has prepared for us.

When there's pain, the other emotions follow; doubt, paranoia, panic, sadness and the feeling you can do absolutely nothing.

"Lou!" I shake my head and snap out of my thoughts. Reality hits me hard on the face when my mum snapped her fingers at me. I'm now back to where I started off.

"How is she?" I ask. And as if on cue, I hear the pained scream from upstairs. I can't help but cover my own ears. Mum grabbed my hands and put them down.

"Shes getting there. What are you doing down here? She's been asking for you every minute." mum sounds pissed. She should be. Shes pissed that the son she raised turns out to be a pussy. "Louis, it's been 7 hours and youve been down here most of the time. What's wrong?" she asks, squeezing my hand.

"It's so hard to watch her in so much pain and I can't do anything about it." I say, rubbing my temples. Her screams ring through my ears and I picture her in tears and weak and tired.

"Honey, it's always difficult to watch someone in pain. Especially if you love that person. But think about it this way, she's doing it for you, for herself and for your son. Who'll be here in a couple of hours. Come on." she squeezes my hands and pulls me to my feet.

I left the guest room because I can't bear the sight in front of me. She looked so weak and distraught. I can't even imagine the pain she's going through right now but what I know is if I can take it from her, I would. Mum had to push me up the staircase. She opens the door and the firs thing I hear is Meg's ragged breathing. It reminds me of the times when memories of her father attacks her and she'd black out. I remember how horrified she looked afterwards.

Meg's eyes meet mine. I feel something squeeze my chest at the sight of her. She looks so weak and tired. I feel my heart break just looking at her like that. I sit beside her on the bed and she immediately holds my hand. Her hand shakes on mine and her eyes close shut. I look down at Lilia who's at the edge of the bed with mum. Then my attention turn to Meg when I hear her breath go shallow.

"Meg, Meg, open your eyes, look at me." her mum says who's now beside her. She turns to her with eyes wide with pain. "You have to push now, alright? You're so close, you're almost there." her mum tells her, brushing her hair back.

Her grip tightens. Her chest rises and falls rapidly due to her shallow breathing. "Lou," I snap my head to my mum's voice. "You have to sit behind her, make sure she's upright."

I'm so unsure of my movements. Lilia supports Meg's back as I position myself behind her. She drops her weight on me and that's when I realize how intense her pain must be. Her body trembles against mine, her back soaked with sweat. Her hand feels around the bed, searching for my hand. A lump in my throat started forming when her hands find me, giving it a tight squeeze. Her breathing stopped. She's pushing.