Wildflower (Kris Bryant)

15 A Walk To Remember

Kris

Every night I'm in the city is my favorite night. I'm not going to lie, leaving is Chicago hard. And I have been playing baseball my whole life and traveling was never hard for me once I got off the airplane. Not when I was home in Nevada or in college at San Diego. Being in the MLB means I get to go to some incredible places and see some amazing things. I would be a idiot not to realize how blessed I am to be paid to travel this country and play the sport I love the most. But leaving Chicago gets harder and harder each time I have to go as I realize just how I good I have it here. I told Serenity that I can fly her out so we can go exploring some of the cities together and we can make memories not in Chicago, but she insists on being home with her family and I can't deny her that. She did move home to closer to them after all.

So instead most nights when I'm here she comes over and we just hang out. She teaches me how to cook or we read or watch a movie. Simple things that most people don't think too much of. But for me it's some of the best times of my life. Just to be with her.

"I have a great movie for you" I insist as I walk into the living room where she was waiting for me. She had the popcorn in her lap ready to go.

"What movie is that" she wonders.

I show it to her and she smiles big. I had found A Walk To Remember the other day and I just couldn't wait to watch it with her. "You know the book is better than the movie" is all she says and I laugh. Of course it's a book and of course she's read it.

"We'll see" I tease.

I pop the movie in then I sit myself onto the couch. I wrap my arm around Serenity and get ready to ball my eyes out. I read this was a real heart crusher so I was mentally prepared. Or so I think I am.

So we relax into the couch and we watch as neither of us say a word for at least a hour. For the first time all my attention wasn't just on Serenity, I was actually really into this movie. It was pretty cheesy with the typical popular bad boy who never noticed the quiet preachers daughter until he needed her help story line. But then the boy needed her help getting out of trouble and like always the girl had every solution to every problem he had throughout the movie. Then he realizes that this girl is actually beautiful and he was the one that was being ugly. She denies him until neither of them can deny each other the love they shared. It was cute though, I liked the song they sang and Mandy Moore is always a great actress. I actually really enjoyed the movie even though I vowed away romantic movies after the Notebook made me cry for three days.

And I thought this movie was destined for another cheesy ending until Jamie reveals that she is sick and was about to die. And she knew the whole time that she was sick and didn't have a lot of time left and never mentioned it to the guy. She let him fall in love and never said a word about her destiny that he could have never changed.

"How could she not tell him" I pout with a tear in my eye.

Serintity turns to me and she looks up in my eyes. I can see some tears in hers too and my heart drops. She looked truly heartbroken, like she's gone through this before. "Maybe she can't tell him. Maybe she wanted to, so many times, but she couldn't. Because she could have told him but that wouldn't have changed the fact she wasn't going to live much longer. Wouldn't have changed the fact that loved or unloved she didn't have a lot of time left. If she told him from the start they wouldn't be living in the present or the future. They would be stuck in the same awful moment where they both know that no matter what they do the ending is still the same" she sniffles.

I pull her into my chest and try to comfort her. This was a really sad movie so I don't blame her for crying. "But once she told him she got everything she wanted. They got married and she got to do a bunch of stuff she never thought she could do before" I say.

"But if she said it earlier he would have treated her differently. He would have felt sorry for her, not love for her, and she would have felt like a nuisance.

If you found out you didn't have that much time left would you want to spend all your time with someone who has feelings for you that weren't real? That was just pity and charity instead of love and hope? Would you want people to know and treat you different even though you yourself haven't changed" she asks.

I think about it for a second before letting out a harsh sigh. "I guess not. I guess I would still do the things as she did" I admit.

We get to the end of the movie and I admit, I shed quite a few tears. Even though I knew she was going to die it still killed me that she did. The story was really good and very beautiful and I honestly felt like I should read the book now. I keep my eyes on the tv and watch the ending which was just as great as the rest of the movie.

"Jamie saved my life. She taught me everything. About life, hope and the long journey ahead. I'll always miss her. But our love is like the wind. I can't see it, but I can feel it."

I turn and look at Serinity's as she had a small smile on her face. I remember her poem from the other day and see the connection. She was a lot like Jamie where she wasn't anything like what I look for in a girl but she was everything I needed. The heart chooses for us and we don't have a lot of say in our lives when it comes to destiny. I don't know what I would do if I ever lost her. She's taught me so much about this life I live and there's so much I need to learn. And I'm thankful all our walks are ones I remember.

Once the movie finishes we clean up the popcorn off the couch and put the movie back in its case. It comes to my least favorite part of the day, when Serenity leaves.

"I hate it when you go" I whisper.

"I hate it when you leave too" she reminds me. "At least when I leave you know I'm still around. When you leave it will be a few days before I see you again."

"Yeah, that's not ideal. But you make it worth while to come back" I assure her.

"I'll see you tomorrow" she promises as she stands up on her toes. She places a kiss on my lips and I smile because I will never get used to those feeling she gives me.