16:58

Chapter Thirty-Two

It's probably around nine or ten when I get back to my apartment. I'm so distracted and caught up in my thoughts, and I've cried more times than I wanted. I feel so much agony, even though Bobbe's okay. He could have been gone, but he's not. And it's so messed up to think that someone just has the power to take people's fucking lives, to take people from their family.

"Hey. Are you okay?" Colton asks.

I jump and curse loudly. "Jesus, you scared me!" I say.

"Sorry," Colton says. "Are you okay?"

I feel more tears forming. "I don't fucking know," I say. "Shit is so scary. Like the fact that someone walked into an elementary school and was able to kill and injure so many people and families...like anyone could be killed at any moment."

Colton stands up. "Put your coat back on," he tells me.

"Why?" I ask, and he's already walking over to where I am and slipping on his coat and shoes.

"Because we're going out for drinks," Colton says.

"I can't go out like this," I say, looking down. I'm in sweatpants. "I look like trash. I should at least put some makeup on—"

"You don't need any," Colton says, and he's pulling me out the door. "You do need a distraction."

"Okay." Honestly, I'm so ecstatic that Colton wants to spend time with me. Maybe it will distract me. Colton's very distracting. I forget how tall he is sometimes. I usually end up having to look up and then his eyes are such a pretty forest green. And his dark chocolate brown hair is always messy, but styled and effortless. Plus, his body is like...it makes me blush. His shoulders are broad and everything is well defined.

"What happened to that kid?" Colton asks, looking back at me.

"He's fucking paralyzed," I tell Colton. "The bullet hit his spinal cord. And his mom told Bobbe that couldn't play any more, but Bobbe said they still could, it would just be a little different."

"I'm sorry," Colton says. We exit the staircase and walk through the lobby to get outside. For all the ugliness in the world, it's a pretty night. It's dark out, which means you can see the stars. And it's snowing lightly.

"Where exactly are you taking me?" I ask, bumping my shoulder into his as we walk.

"Just the bar down the street," Colton says.

"You know, I don't really remember the last time I drank," I tell him. "I think I burned myself out in high school."

"You don't have to drink," Colton says, looking at me. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to."

I almost smile. It's so considerate that he said that. It doesn't really mean anything, but it's nice knowing that he's not going to pressure me.

"To be honest, all I want to do is forget about all the fucked up things going around," I tell him.

"Well," Colton says as he opens the door to the bar, "then when you step into the bar, leave everything behind. It'll be there waiting for you when we leave."

I know I shouldn't, but when we walk into the bar, I reach behind me for Colton's hand. I want to blame it on being dark in the bar with flashing lights, but I think it's really because I want to make sure he's still with me.

We sit down at the bar. The bartender smiles. "Hey, what can I get you guys?"

I look at Colton. "Can I get a Shirley Temple?" I ask, smiling because it's kind of lame, but I don't care.