Oblivion • Akutagawa x Reader

•11

"Let him go."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"Because I made him a promise."

•••

You look at Atsushi with guilt, not knowing what to say.

"I'm sorry-I..."

You bite your lip out of nervousness, taking a strand of your hair and playing with it in an uncomfortable silence, until Atsushi speaks up again.

"He's hurt you more than anyone else. So why..?"

You didn't even have to think to reply.

"Because I wouldn't want anyone else to hurt me the way he has, and I'd go through it again."

I love him.

I don't really understand it myself...

•••

Foreign music is heard throughout the entire ballroom, the lyrics silky and pleasantly moving to the audience's ears. The Port Mafia building had never looked so normal since you had been here, but at the same time never so extravagant. Mori had ordered a party to celebrate an occasion you couldn't quite remember the name of, but you had a suspicion it really was because of Elise. Unable to say no to the boss, you had arrived wearing a navy cocktail dress to your liking, silver heels matching the elegant silver choker around you neck. Your hair was down but nicely done, meaning to frame your face.

It was rare for you to dress up like this, but you were more surprised seeing the rest of your co-workers, superiors, and even subordinates dressed up with a beauty you didn't know could encase the Mafia. Higuchi looked stunning with a black dress, and although she was sceptic of you, she respected you as Akutagawa's partner, smiling politely as she passed by you. Kouyou, also starring a black dress that hugged in all the perfect places, welcomed you to the party, telling you to be careful of the mixed drinks brought by Chuuya. You weren't incredibly close with the ginger port mafia executive, but you knew his love for wines was not supported by his low tolerance, and he almost never knew his limits. Even when mixing. You caught a glimpse of him at the bar, and you had to admit he looked incredibly handsome like a celebrity in a suit.

It had been a few minutes since the latest song playing ended, and you quickly got bored as they set up a new set of songs to play.

'Where's Akutagawa?'

Your mind wandering, you came to the conclusion that either Akutagawa was bold enough to refuse the invitation from the boss himself, or you had missed him completely in the sea of port mafia members.

You frown as you scan the large room for what seemed like the millionth time without a sign of your partner.

'He has to be here...but if he was, I would have found him already no? He's not exactly one to blend in...'

You sigh and conform to just meandering around with a new drink in your hand, trying to find someone to talk to, or something better to do.

A few drinks later, you found yourself at one of the ends of the room near a window. Looking out the window, you smile to yourself. The moon seems brighter, the city looking more lively than you remembered it. The night seemed to glow in your eyes.

"What are you doing?"

Not checking who was speaking, you continue to look out the window, placing your hand against the window.

"Looking outwards...the lights are calming." You say, remembering your boredom and looking up at the person who was next to you, turned to where you were you had been looking.

"Akutagawa?"

Wearing a black suit, his lean figure stood tall and serene beside you, his grey eyes looking out and reflecting the moon in them. That was the first time you ever associated his eyes with the silver orb decorating the night sky. You felt your cheeks heat up as he turns to you, looking at the empty glass in your hand and giving you a questioning look.

"For all your big talk, you have many irresponsible moments"

"Irresponsible? No...I was..." you pause, tapping your thin glass to your lips.

"I was looking for you, actually."

"Why?"

"Because I was bored and I hadn't seen you here." You mumble, handing a waiter your empty glass to put away as they walked by.

Akutagawa glances out the window, deep in thought before looking back at you, eyes widening slightly but keeping his composure as he felt your eyes evidently on him, unwavering.

"Did you know your eyes look like the moon? Like...a light surround by dark." You point out, brushing his messy hair with a hand away to look at his face better, your hand dripping lightly on his shoulder, feeling the expensive material  his suit was made of, taking a moment to look him over again.

Akutagawa stays silent at your comment, his cheeks lightly pink, startled.

'Has he always looked so...striking? Is it the alcohol? Why does he make my feel like...this?'

"You know I could kill you right now right?" Akutagawa asks as he eyes your hand on him, subconsciously leaning into your touch.

"You wouldn't. And if you did, I'd stop you. I've survived this long..."

New music fills the silence between you two, another sweet melody playing.

"...Akutagawa? Why do you hate me?" You ask softly, the liquid courage not failing you for a second.

Akutagawa takes your hand away from him, but you hold on to it after he lets go.

"I don't hate you, [l/n]..." He responds softly, counting in the fact that you were too drunk to recall some of this conversation the next day.

"But I'll only hurt you."

"I don't care. I'll handle it."

The music grows louder, and Akutagawa takes hold of both of your hands, pulling you towards him. Your face is dangerously close to his, and you can feel your heart jumping out of its cage. The music blurs together, the world around you spins.

You never remembered what happened after that.