Are you happy? (GxG)

All I knew

Once everyone had woken up on Sunday, we had picked up Ali and taken her bowling with us. After we had parted ways, most of us wanted to get a fairly early night because of school the next day.

Kye was quite quiet the next morning. He had driven up to the house in his car, ready to pick me up, however, had not gotten out of the car as usual. Instead, he sat, parked up outside and sent me a text.

As soon as I got it, I ran outside, with a soon to be diminished hop in my step. I could see on his face the moment I walked in. I don't know what it was- he just seemed off. As if he had a lot on his mind.

"Hey, you okay?" I asked, reaching out my hand to hold his. In response, he flinched away placing both of his hands on the wheel. He doesn't look at me as he takes the car out of the park and reverses out of the driveway. A few seconds pass and I have no idea what to say. That is, of course, before Kye's next exclamation.

"What's the point of this!" He blurted out unexpectantly. "I mean, who are we kidding?" I placed my hand on his thigh in order to help him relax,

"Kye..." I didn't know what else to say; I was still not quite sure where this was going. He flinched away again,

"Don't do that!" He yelled, flailing his hands in the air. Someone to You by the BANNERS starts playing on the radio- the same song that was playing on our first date.

Kye breathed for a second, latching onto my gaze. "What kind of relationship do you want?" he said calmly. It seemed that his eyes were scouring through mine, searching for some answer to his worries.

"I don't know!" I sobbed. I felt like an idiot, tears beginning to drip down my face. I watched as Kye's hand trembled on the steering wheel.

"Maybe we should stop somewhere... You shouldn't drive like this..." I murmured but was immediately cut off by the obviously frustrated and upset boy beside of me.

"Like what?" He snapped, clenching his fingers on the wheel, "I'm sorry..." He said a second later, guilt painted on his face. From then on, we drove without speaking, giving me time to wipe the faint droplets running down my cheek.

"Kye?" I whispered, breaking the veil of silence.

"Mel, I..." He gulped "I think we should end it. End us." His voice was weak and strained. My mouth hung open- I couldn't believe what was happening.

"No, Kye." I gasped. What's happening right now? Kye doesn't take his eyes off the road, but I can tell he's crying now.

"Do you love me?" He asked, trying to keep himself together.

"Kye, I... We've been together for so long." I stalled but he just shook his head,

"Do you love me?" He asked again, with a little more anger behind the words. I wanted to argue, I wanted to tell him he was wrong. But he was right. He's my best friend- and I love him for that. Maybe he was more to me at some point- I don't know. I raised my head to stare at the ceiling of the car as we park up in front of the school. Neither of us dared to move.

"Not... not like that." I looked over at him. "I'm sorry," I croaked and he grabs my hand, sorrow filling his eyes.

"I love you." He began, "But... it's starting to feel like you don't feel the same. I mean, you just admitted that so, of course, you don't..." His voice is hollow, his word choice clumsy and all over the place, "I'm sorry..." He said suddenly letting go of my hand and opening the car door as I opened mine. We both climb out, eyes watery, faces red. He doesn't say anything, neither do I. We part slowly and just before I'm out of range he says,

"Goodbye Melody." It's not just a goodbye. It's goodbye to us. We're over. Kye and I are over.

***

*small trigger warning here*

I wasn't functioning as I walked to my locker. Brie smiled at me but I didn't do anything- I just stared into space.

"Hello?" She said, "Anybody home?" I looked up at her, water filling my eyes,

"Kye and I just broke up," I muttered, letting the words resonate in me. We broke up. Two years and... that's it. It almost seemed anti-climatic. As if there was supposed to be more, like a big argument or something that meant we'd never meet again. But here it was- the cold hard truth- it was mundane. A mundane, emotional and messy breakup.

Brie gasped, pulling me into a hug and I just cry into her shoulder. I was an ugly mess but I couldn't have cared less. May joined in and soon I was crying into both of my friend's arms. There was no sign of Thalia anywhere.

That day was a blur. I didn't have music either, neither did I see Thalia. I think it was during English when it all really hit me. It was Period 5- the first lesson after lunch and I could feel the sandwich which I had picked at during lunch swirling around in my stomach. I had barely talked, let alone eaten. I kept scratching the back of my neck and leaning back in my chair.

I was pretty sure I didn't sit still the whole lesson. It was almost as if I had to move. Tapping my pencil on the desk, bopping my knee up and down, biting my nails. The funny thing was, I didn't even realise I was doing it. Until May leaned forward to whisper in my ear,

"Seriously, stop it. You are going to make me throw." It wasn't said in a mean way. Nor was it hurtful. If anything, it was just a joke. But it drove me over the edge.

I just felt as if I was going to explode. I couldn't stop shaking: my hands, my legs, my neck. Everything. So, I just stood up and walked out. Mrs Belle had just stopped mid-sentence staring at me as I just left. She didn't stop me- didn't yell.

As soon as I'd left that hellhole I bolted for the toilets, leaning over the sink. I stared at my reflection, my stupid long hazel hair, thin nose and small ears. Then I threw up. Everything I'd eaten that day covered the sink and I started to cry. Shaking and covered in a mixture of puke and tears, I fell to the floor. The world was spinning now, I felt like an idiot and at the same time didn't have a care in the world.

The doors burst open behind me and May ran in yelling my name but I could barely hear her over the sound of my own head. She was shaking me now, swearing at the top of her voice. After that Mrs Belle walked in but I couldn't comprehend anything. I was so lost. So, lost.

A/N

I don't really know what to say at this point. I wrote this when I was at a pretty bad point in my life. Thank you for reading. If you ever need anyone to talk to I'm always here to listen. Hope you enjoyed and hope you have a really good day x

Edited