Are you happy? (GxG)

Silhouette

Thalia's POV

I pressed my head further into my hands, my breath picking up. Quicker and quicker, I felt the cold air rush through my lungs, begging to enter my blood. This can't be happening... But it was. It was all happening at once- the loud noises echoing in my head, the soft crack as my heart began to split in two. I was breaking, every bone in my body shaking with the relapse of emotion that had just been struck upon me. I felt it pushing against me, crushing me under its abnormal weight. I tried. I tried so hard to beat it. But, as the water fell in streams from my eyes I felt a soft release in my chest and my world came tumbling down.

***

They say that the night is when you feel the most. When there are no more distractions. No background noise, nothing to distract you from the thoughts lurking inside of your head, aching to claw their way out. It's the time you are alone, with no one to guide you through the darkness inside your own head. For me, it was never quiet, there was always some sort of yelling echoing through my head. Whether from my own house or the one next door. Nights had never been... safe. So believe me, when I awoke from that nightmare, I wasn't surprised. Nightmares had been reoccurring throughout my childhood, only stopping after my dad had yelled at me for screaming during the night when I was eleven.

It had been a week since I started living here and I was able to see Melody less and less. And of course, every night was followed by another taunting nightmare in which I awake covered in sweat. It was mostly just memories of some of the worst times my dad had gotten angry at me, sometimes more of feelings than actual images. Feelings of worthlessness and guilt. It just seemed that my brain wished to make everything in my life more difficult- as if it had to remind itself to be sad. I had been so happy these past few weeks, I'd finally gotten away from that dreadful household and despite my longing to visit my mom, I was enjoying it here. Holland's parents radiated hope and happiness, both so enthusiastic to care for their small boy. It was the kind of love that sent an odd wave of envy through me. I pulled off my shirt, feeling a short rush as all the heat pooling of my body was released. 

Although I was out of that house, it still felt like he was controlling me. Like he still had power over my emotions and I hated it. I decided to take a quick shower not only to wash away the sweat which coated my body but also in hope that it might take my misplaced distress with it. Holland has to leave for school earlier than me so Victoria placed a quick kiss on my forehead before leaving with his hand in hers. Andrew was stood by the kitchen, watching me thoughtfully as I put another cornflake in my mouth.

"How are you?" He asked slowly, placing his mug on the kitchen island and locking my gaze into his. I shrugged as he leaned against the side of the island, "I mean, it's been almost a week so I was just hoping you were sleeping okay..."

"I slept fine," I murmured pulling my mouth into the, more believable, shape of a grin. Truth was, I just didn't want them to worry, they obviously had so much going on at the moment, it was a surprise they even had time to take me in.

"I don't know what you had to deal with before now but, you are safe here and both my wife and I are here for you if you need to talk," Andrew continued. I nodded slowly, not trusting myself with speaking to him.

"I better go..." I said, glancing up at the clock. Andrew turned around then back, still smiling at me. It was a soft grin, more comforting than anything.

"Have a good day."

***

Melody was waiting for me by the lockers, a smile painted across her face.

"Hi!" She exclaimed brightly and I forced a smile in her direction as I entered my code and swung the small metal door open.

"Hi..." I mumbled, exchanging some of the books in my locker.