Blue Eyes in Mine (Hollowheart)

Jump into the Void

ENOCH'S POV AGAIN!!!: 

     Over the next couple days I kept getting those same weird dreams! It made me feel weird and conscious of Jake. I kept worrying I'd see him and act stranger than normal, but he never showed up to class. I'd search for him in the classes we'd shared, while Victor gave me a little wink (he thought I didn't see them, but I did!!), and I'd always be disappointed, but just a teeny bit relieved.

     Was it something I did?? I kept asking the same stupid question every morning when I woke up after those dreams. 

     On a Friday afternoon as I was walking to the cafeteria to meet up with Horace, I saw a very colorful flyer that caught my attention. I stood a moment looking at it as students had to go around me as I was blocking the way, some giving me nasty glares as they did so. "Come join the LGBTQ meetings!! Every Thursday night, 6PM in the Grand Hall (rm #202). THERE'LL BE FREE FOOD!!" 

     LGBTQ?? I know enough about it to have a decent conversation with someone. Even Horace is a part of it. I know about the 'L' and 'G' in the acronym, but not that much about the others. A little bit about the 'B' too, I guess. 

     I walked straight towards Horace at the back of the cafeteria, where he was occupied with two cups of coffee. As I sat down, I pulled out the flyer I took from the post. "What's LGBTQ?" 

     Horace was very surprised, but couldn't pull a smirk as he held his cup up to his mouth. "Why do you want to know?" I merely shrugged. I didn't even know why I took the flyer with me. "Are you trying to tell me something?" 

     "No." I took the other coffee cup and started chugging it down. 

     "You can't act stupid with me, O'Connor. You know exactly who the LGBTQ community is." 

     I didn't want to answer. I drank my coffee so I'd have an excuse to prolong the inevitable answer I'd have to give the diva. I looked around the room, making sure there wasn't people close enough to overhear my conversation. When I made sure the coast was clear, I whispered, "I've been having weird dreams." 

     Horace's eyes grew wide. "About who?" There was a devilish grin on his face. I looked Iike I wanted to kill him right here among the other students in this cafeteria, but Horace laughed even more. "OH, I know who!" He just about shouted, giving me a wink. Some students turned their heads towards our table, annoyance written all over their features. I was ready to die right there. 

     "Hush!!" I whispered-yelled at Horace when everyone went back to minding their own businesses. "This is serious!" 

    "Right, right." Horace said, trying to act business-like, but the redness in his cheeks from laughing too hard was still prominent. "So... Jake huh?" I hesitantly nodded. 

     "I've had the same weird dreams for days now. And frankly.... I can't stop thinking about him." I sipped my coffee before continuing, "I don't know what this means!" 

     "Well, sorry to tell ya Enoch, but this kind of thing isn't rocket science. This is about feelings, love, that sorta thing.  I think you simply like Jake. As in like-like." He wiggled his brows as he said this. My cheeks were turning into the color of strawberries!

     "For once in your life Horace, I think you may be right!" Horace tried swatting my arms for my comment, but I quickly dodged. Then we both broke up laughing. I took a moment to observe the flyer in front of me, from the rainbow colors in the background to the Acronym: LGBTQ. 

     Lesbian

                Gay

                      Bisexual 

                                 Transgender

                                                       Queer 

     With a deep sigh, I finally said what I've been dreading. I mean, I've been told at the church I was forced to go with my parents that this kind of thing is very bad. And my family aren't very happy about it either, though they still love Horace. I feel like I don't know anything anymore... that everything I've been told growing up is now a lie. But I didn't care about that stuff anymore, I told myself. I'd leap into the void if that is what it means to be true to myself. 

     "Horace, I think I'm bisexual."