𝙤𝙣𝙚-𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙩𝙨

26 | tárgét

just a little bit of crack to bring back the good old times whoops

...

6:50 am ☞ the target parking lot

"i'm gonna rip out your trachea." the screams that followed that statement were nothing but shrill, footsteps pounding the cracked pavement. the large beige building that overshadowed them was ominous, the bright red target symbol glowing since the sun hasn't quite woken up yet.

"it wasn't my fault! i can't drive, you know that!" more screams.

"just because you can't drive doesn't mean you can drag me across the lot by my toes!" daniel huffed for a second, placing his hands on his knees to take a break from chasing his blonde friend around the vehicle. "you're lucky boss isn't here this week."

"what's he gonna do? fire me? this place is hell anyways."

their conversation was interrupted by the bright song of corbyn's ring tone. both froze, their minds still bleary from sleep and the incident they just had.

"hello?"

"where the frick are you two? we accidentally hung zach." jack said, his voice muffled through the mostly broken phone.

"you what?!"

"shoot, that sounded bad. we just need help."

the two in the lot exchanged a distressed look before running inside the store.

⊙

7:10 am ☞ aisle 5

"ow! ow! ow!" zach chanted, occasionally stopping to take a quick breath before going right back into yelling.

"how the frickin frack diddly dack did you even get stuck up here?" jonah yelled, tugging at zach's leg.

"stop!" zach's voice cracked halfway through. "my nuts! my nuts!"

the youngest employee was currently hanging off of a ladder by his underpants, screaming in pain while the other four cried from a mixture of laughter and stress.

"what were you trying to accomplish?" jack asked.

"the light was acting wonky, what else was i supposed to do, leave it?"

at that, the four older boys stopped. they exchanged glances before looking back up at their stuck coworker.

"oh, zach. clearly you've never had a job before."

with one final tug and a eardrum-destroying scream from zach, the boy was on the ground with his ripped superman underpants hanging behind him like a tail.

⊙

8:00 am ☞ the register

"no ma'am, we do not have chainsaws here, i'm sorry."

"the hell you mean you don't have chainsaws? i don't know if you noticed, young man, but this is alabama."

jonah was going to decimate this woman's weave. he never should have taken a position in customer service, especially in the country town they were living in.

"i am well aware of what state we are in. unfortunately, our location does not change the amount of chainsaws we have."

"you just wait until i get my hands on one of them chainsaws, this here target will never see the light of day again!"

honestly ma'am, be my guest. this job is destroying whatever will i have left to live. jonah thought bitterly.

"thank you for coming to me." jonah was going to take a chainsaw to this woman's fingers.

⊙

12:00 pm ☞ the bathroom

"i'm literally going to hurl."

jack gagged before glaring at the two boys sitting on the bathroom counter.

"will you two help me instead of giggling about some stupid cat video?!" he yelled, frustrated.

"sorry jack, but i'm not going anywhere near that toxic shit. you can handle this one, mister janitor."

jack groaned and grouched more before going to mop the floor. whoever the hell was in the stall clearly did not have a good time.

"why do i work here. all i do is clean up shit-" jack gagged again. "literally."

"that's a fat question. wanna go play laser tag next door after closing?" corbyn swung his legs from his spot on the barf blue counter.

"who's asking?" daniel leaned over the sink to glance at his best friend's phone screen.

"eben, he said they just added more obstacles n stuff."

jack rolled his watering eyes. the rancid odor was starting to get to his brain.

"you're lucky i love laser tag or this shit would be in your mouths."

...