I won't forget you... (Sequel to "Blame it on me")

Ch. 15

"Thomas?"

The echoing familiar sound that came when the door open flooded his body with relief. "Tord, you know you could have said something if you were coming in. Your knocking scared my soul out of my damn body." Tom remarked, standing up and sighing as a suppressed laugh escaped Tord's lips.

"Also, when have you ever called me Thomas?" Tom asked, dusting himself off as Tord looked at him and then around his room. "I dunno. Doesn't matter." Tord mumbled, walking over to his bed and laying on it, looking up at the ceiling with his legs dangling off the side. Tom chuckled and leaned on the side of the wall to face his bed, his shoulder on the wall while his arms were crossed.

"Why are you here?" Tom asked confusedly, as Tord shrugged and continued to lay on Tom's bed with no other words. A couple moments of silence were replaced by the clocks loud ticking that sounded louder than it should have, making something inside of Tom feel slightly uneasy. Almost as if he was somewhere unrecognizable.

"Edd told me you were being depressed or something so I came to check on you." Tord muttered, stretching his arms out across the bed. Tom sighed and thought about the irony of Edd saying that he was depressed. The feeling continued to grow inside of him though, thumping against his chest and making him just as nervous as he was while he stood by the door a few seconds ago, just waiting for something to happen. If they lived at any point in time from the other universe, they would understand more. But there were two things he came back for.

"Have you ever wondered if there was a parallel universe where everything was the same, expect you didn't exist?" Tord ing his head to the side to stare Tom in the eyes, almost as if he could see directly through him. A moment of silence set in between the two as the tension grew. The taller male took some time to process what Tord asked before his eyes widened from shock, and almost fear.

It was almost as if Tord could remember something that Tom didn't, but that couldn't be true. Tom had no idea where the sudden question came from, as a growing feeling of agony deepened inside of him. A sudden feeling of wanting to yell grew inside of Tom's throat. He stopped himself, though. Everything would be fine, it was just a question. He just felt uneasy from time to time for no reason. Almost as if something inside of him knew something was wrong, but it didn't occur to him yet that the space around him wasn't what it seemed.

"No...why?" Tom asked. The room silenced yet again, the ticks of the clock becoming gradually louder inside of Tom's ears, just like the clock he heard every day. The ticking slowly entered into his head as he tried to grasp his head and calm himself down, but he couldn't move his arms. Louder and louder the ticking slowly sounded more like thumping or loud stomping, pulsing through his head and making him start to feel more insecure. Tom felt like he started shaking all of a sudden.

The warm presence of his room that was once there was now gone, and a cold draft of air sent shivers up his spine. He realized the warm presence he thought was once there was never even there in the first place. Despite this, it was replaced by a sudden jolt of fear. The clocks ticking getting louder and louder, making him feel like he was driven insane. He tried to look around him but he couldn't. The more he tried to fight himself the more he realized he was in desperate need for help.

He collapsed onto the ground and looked up at Tord, who wasn't there. It was only a pale white blank that was now there, replacing his room with the light shade. It didn't calm him despite the calm nature of the color. Instead it made him worried and fearful. The more he tried to fight against the noise the more he realized he couldn't hear it, until all he heard was silence.

Silence in the room he was in. It was like the sound of white noise. A high pitch ring echoed through his ears that caused him to duck his head down, until it completely stopped. Every noise that he once heard that was once pulsing through his brain and veins had stopped suddenly, just like that. For a moment he actually felt... relieved. He felt like all the fears he felt for that moment stopped. But when he lifted his head, he wasn't where he used to be. The chalky taste of medication was inside of his mouth. It was like the taste of swallowing pills without water. Disgusting and disappointing.

He finally saw that was around him. The room he was in was a white padded room with an iron door and a window that was sealed shut and with wire. He tried to stand up but fell to the floor when he realized that his arms couldn't be used to help him balance. The straight jacket he was in tightened around him as he tried to wriggle free. There was a pillow propped up against the wall that was blankly standing there in the same position Tord was in before, until the pillows collapsed and fell on top of his head. Tom shook them off and looked around him. There were four pillows and nothing else. Everything was just quiet.

He realized where he was again as memories flooded through his head, making him feel disgusted at himself. He looked down at the pale white straight jacket he was in and noticed how his arms seemed bony and weak through the pacing of the jacket. It made him unable to move completely and made Tom feel virtually helpless and unwanted. Painful memories made his head feel like it was being set on fire as he tried to tune the voices out so he could focus once again on what he always did. The disgusting taste of medication was still in his mouth as he tried to get it out by swallowing his saliva, eventually making the taste worse and more noticeable.

All he could feel at that moment was regret and sorrow. He needed to her back to where he wanted to be and continue. Tom couldn't just leave and ignore what he had to go back for. A wave of sadness hit him like a brick to the face as he felt like he wanted to just lay there and cry his eyes out for the rest of eternity, only hoping he would drown in his tears after a while of waiting for a miracle to approach him.

A tear escaped through his eye and dropped onto the white padded floor, as he propped the pillow back up into Tords position and took a deep breath. He awkwardly wriggled his way to the corner and spit the disgusting taste out of his mouth, trying to force himself to throw up. A feeling of pain and guilt flooded his body as he knew they were just trying to help him. He didn't need their help, though. All he needed was to leave the world he was stuck in and go back to where he once was. Tom moved his tongue so the back was at the top of his throat and gagged, saliva dripping down his mouth. He continued and gagged again, more of his saliva dripping down his mouth and onto the floor now in the corner of the blank room he was in.

A rush of adrenaline filled his veins as he rubbed the saliva dripping down his mouth onto the side of his shoulder, trying to ignore the feeling of disgust he was in at that moment. Another gag escaped the back of his throat as he felt sick to his stomach. The taste of medication helped fuel his anger as he gagged once more, more tears dripping down the sides of his cheeks and landing on the floor. Previous stains from times he zoned out were on the floor, and he was just continuing what he needed. He didn't care if everything he had been doing was fake, because that was okay.

After a few more attempts, he felt it coming up to the back of his throat as he gagged once more and threw up virtually everything he ate. If he did eat, he didn't eat much. There was almost nothing but a yellow colored mess that was on the floor, followed by some white, chalky bits as well. He smiled and tried to wipe his mouth against his straight jacket, shuffling back to his position in the room he woke up in and closed his eyes, his throat feeling a bit more sore than it was before. A cry for help escaped through his mouth as he curled up into a ball on the floor and closed his eyes, zoning out once again and ignoring everything once more.

The sounds of ticking came back, only it was not as loud as it was previously. Tom didn't want to look up, but the warmness in the room greeted him with open arms. He wasn't sure if it was hugging him or choking him, but he looked up. He was back in his room, and Tord was still there. Tom looked up at Tord and stood up from the floor, wiping his eyes.

"Actually, now that I think about it, I have."