Can't Stop Me (Sick!Deku AU)

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Bakugo Katsuki

A light hit my eyelids out of nowhere, how fucking annoying. I tried to put my arm over my eyes but it got caught on something, also annoying. Reluctantly I woke up and looked around, this isn't my room?

"Kacchan?" Deku? Oh, right...he woke up and I slept in the room with him. I looked over towards his voice and almost screamed at how close we were, he was still asleep and out noses were touching.

Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit-

I sat up quickly and got off of his bed as quietly as I could. How did we end up that close? I remember I went to sleep on the chair why was I in bed with him?! Never a-fucking-gain.

Ms. Midoriya was still asleep in the other chair, what time is it? I plugged my phone in against the wall last night and put it on the window sill so it should still be there. I turned it on looked at the displayed numbers, 7:56? Damn, that's early.

If I leave before Deku wakes up he'll think I flaked on him so I'd better wait. Plus dad probably isn't awake anyway and he's the one I need to speak to. Well, I guess I should just get dressed? It's not a school day so I just brought my favorite black shirt with its skull design and some jeans.

I can't change in the open, I mean I've changed in front of Deku before but I'd never change in front of a chick asleep or not. That's another thing I need to talk to dad about, chicks. I think I might be broken or some shit, all these dudes talk about is girls but they just don't do it for me.

Whatever I can change in the bathroom attached to the room. I grabbed my clothes and locked myself in it, hospital bathrooms look weird. There are railings everywhere and the shower has three different seats, my mom would love it she hates standing in the shower. It's cuz she's such an old witch.

I don't usually wear a shirt when I sleep but since I slept here I did, it was red with buttons. I took my time unbuttoning it, I break my buttons a lot by hurrying. Then I pulled my shirt on, it's wrinkly which is ugly but whatever.

I finished getting dressed and looked into the mirror, my hair looks too flat. I pulled at it until it looked perfect and then gathered my pajamas and went back into the main room. I stashed my pajamas in the bag I'd brought and then got my toothbrush, toothpaste, and the other shit.

If you don't take care of your teeth you're dumb, germs will eat your enamel and kill you. You have to murder them first! Usually, I brush after I eat but since I woke up so early I don't feel like eating and I don't want to forget to murder the germs.

Back in the bathroom, I began my oh so familiar routine of dental care. Here's how you murder those fucking germs, you have to count 60 seconds for your top teach and bottom teeth and you have to use circular motions not back and force. Make sure you do the front of the teeth, the top, and the back and rotate from brushing the one side of your mouth's teeth to the front teeth to the other side. After 60 seconds of brushing the top row do the same thing on the bottom. Then at the end do a quick brush for the teeth most visible throughout the day so they're extra white, everybody's a little vain.

Then floss! Go between every tooth and really work it, you don't want any gunk leftover because fuck them germs! After flossing I use mouthwash but I read somewhere that they aren't that important. I like to feel like my mouth is on fucking fire because it proves the germs were eradicated.

Alright, all done. When I returned to the main room Deku was waking up, his waking up face has been the exact same ever since we were kids. I put my dental stuff away and he looked my way, "Mornin Kacchan."

"Morning Deku," I packed the rest of my bag and looked at him, "Well you survived the night. Listen, I need to go talk to my dad about some stuff. You gonna be alright alone?" Deku looked a little pale but that's to be expected.