Shigadabi One-Shots

Cuts

(A TRIGGERING story in which Dabi finds Shigaraki harming himself.)

AGAIN, TRIGGERING CHAPTER! IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE TO THIS KIND OF THING, DONT READ!

Shigaraki's P.O.V

It was just like the last time. Only this time, it started with a dream. I haven't been getting the sleep I've needed because of insomnia and overthinking. Depression has always been something I've had difficulties with and sometimes, I would relapse into old bad habits. I haven't cut myself in a few months. I've been trying to get over it but recently, the thought of self harm lingers in my mind a little too long for comfort. I took melatonin a few hours ago but instead of taking just one, I took about three. You can't overdose on melatonin; I've tried before. It just makes you tired. But sometimes, the melatonin would give me nightmares or even worse, sleep paralysis.

I went to change from my black pants and shirt to a white button up, a few sizes too big. It was comforting and went down to my knees so I had no need for sleep shorts. I fell asleep rather quickly, the wind shifting through cracks in the wall and around my windows in the hideout. We each had our own rooms that were connected by a bathroom in the middle. Toga and Twice shared a bathroom, Dabi and I shared a bathroom, and Kurogiri had his own. He also had the biggest room but he decided on rooms for all of us because he was basically the father of our group and did the most around the hideout. Our rooms weren't the best; the floorboards creaked and it was always a bit cold or too hot depending on the weather outside. But it was the best we could manage and I've been in worse situations.

My dream was nothing short of terrifying and traumatic. Well, I guess it was a dream. It was more like sleep paralysis. I have this old wooden rocking chair in the corner of my room. It always kinda scared me because the wind would blow it and the creaky floor boards would make noises as it moved. Anyways, one second I was sleeping and the next my eyes fluttered open. But I was still in a dream state. I could move my eyes and I could blink but I couldn't do anything else. I couldn't move, talk, or even scream for help. My worst fears come to life. You would think after suffering from sleep paralysis for so long, I would get used to it but it was always different. Sometimes, I just couldn't move. Other times, scary hallucinations would occur. And that's just what happened tonight.

I was laying in my back and my eyes traveled to the rocking chair. On that chair, there was a woman crying her eyes out. I didn't recognize the lady as anyone I knew which kinda freaked me out more. I stared at her for a while when all of the sudden, she started ripping her insides out. Her skin was a pale skin color and she had blonde hair. She just stared at me, her hands gripping her body parts as she pulled them from her and dropped the to her feet. I closed my eyes hoping I would fall asleep and it would go away. But that when I felt pressure on my chest. I creaked my eyes open to see her sitting on my chest, her tears turning to blood as she pulled out her intestines and dropping them on me. I don't remember much after that but I woke up, I was in a cold sweat and I was breathing heavy.

Sitting up, I rubbed my eyes and I looked at my rocking chair, no blood, no body parts, and no woman. Breaking out into tears, my hands go for my face and I try to muffle my sobs. That was when a thought entered my mind. Self harm. It suddenly felt like a good idea; lifting the weight off my shoulders. I pulled the covers off of my small figure and trudged to the bathroom, locking my room door behind me. Going through the medicine cabinet, I look for benzodiazepine, my anti anxiety medication. Taking two, I took a sip of water from a spit cup and tried calming down. I was still shaky though, digging through drawers now finding my loose razor blade. It had to be here somewhere. Sliding my hands around, a sharp pain came from my palm. Listing it up, a small drop of blood came from a puncture in my hand. Looking at the drawer, I saw it there, amidst other various things.