the arts | svt

love song 06

i couldn't fall asleep that night. and no, it wasn't because of the horror movie we watched, i was more concerned about what happened after.
you know, the 'soonyoung pulling me onto his lap which was insanely hot move'

i couldn't get that feeling out of my head as i tossed in my bed that night. that feeling of my heart pumping faster than sonic didn't leave me. he made a bold move but i wasn't complaining.

his firm grip tightened round me as i hitched my breathe.

"is this what you wanted?" he whispered

of course i was way too flustered to even speak, so i just sat there like a fish with my mouth wide open. yeah, totally attractive

"soonyoung i-"
i stuttered

"what's the matter? not close enough?"

at that moment, i felt his left hand slide down my waist and sneaking it's way onto my thigh as he gripped it tightly

our faces neared each other. my eyes embracing a close up view of the boy himself. his chubby cheeks and boyish grin filled his mischief.

our breath tickled each other's faces due to our close proximity. if i moved even a few centimeters closer, we'd be-

it was just unfortunate our moment was ruined

"yo losers we ordered food so–

in that moment jihoon had to walk in.

his eyes laid on the situation where i was sat on soonyoung's thick thighs whilst his arms were tightly wrapped round whilst the other rested on my thighs. we didn't really look very pure at first glance.

as if dua lipa's song rang through when my head when jihoon did a full 180.

"damn it's always me." he retched

jihoon and i really have the worst luck. he had a habit of walking in at bad timings

"i need holy water." he muttered to himself

and that's when the second hand embarrassment kicked in. along with my realization that i was on soonyoung's lap. i mean before i wasn't complaining but now, there was something inside of me telling to run away as fast as possible

"i should get going." i blurted, trying to leave from his arms

"are you sure, jihoon just ordered food."
his grip loosened but he still didn't want to let me go

"i'm sure, it's getting a bit late." i waffled

"oh, let me walk you home then–

"no!"
i jumped off his lap. i also realized how rude i sounded from my abrupt rejection.
"i mean it's fine, thank you for asking."

"fine."
he pouted, disappointed in my answer
"but i'm walking you out okay, no complaints."

as he rose from his bed, he led us out of his room and to the exit. a wave of embarrassment hit me leaving me unable to lift my head.

"well if isn't the love birds, come join eat before jihoon inhales all the food!" jun called out to us.

all three boys were crowded round the dining table with freshly delivered food that i couldn't deny smelt good as hell.

unfortunately at that moment, my eyes made brief eye contact with wonwoo. his usual introverted avoided eye contact with me. did i do anything to him?

pretending that it didn't hurt, i waved goodbye to everyone as i stepped outside of the dorm. they mumbled their fair well but didn't really care since they were too busy stuffing their faces with food.

soonyoung stepped outside along with me, closing the door behind him so it just left us two in the corridors leading to other dorms.

"seulmin.." he began in a serious tone.

holy shit, this guys being serious for once? of course that made me panic a hell lot more

"about what happened before-"

"forget about it."
i blurted before he could even finish

i came here to finish my project for my school work. that was my reason, to focus on my education and this school to get the best grades but there i was neglecting my own work just to flirt with a guy i'm not even sure i like?

i had to sort out my priorities.

"we were just messing around right?"
i faked a smile

soonyoung's serious face turned glum and his usual smiling lips pursed into a straight line. he then shook his head, laughing but i could tell it was fake

"of course." he smiled "just playing around."

i let out a sigh
"okay good, i just didn't want things to be misunderstood."

he nodded, avoiding eye contact as he stared at the ground
"yeah, i totally get you."

"thanks for understanding."
i say as i clutch the strap of my handbag

for a moment, there was silence between us. usually our talks were filled with us saying stupid shit or laughter but it was awfully too quiet. he wasn't even looking at me.

"i had fun today with you." i confessed
"thank you for hanging out with me."

after the long silence soonyoung lifted his head, revealing the great grin on his face. it seemed so similar to his usual smile but something seemed off

"of course you'd have fun hanging out with me, who doesn't?"

i scoffed, shaking my head

"now go home before it gets dark okay?" he said warmly as he pinched my cheeks just to annoy me.

"and why should i listen to you."
was the worst thing for me to say when his hands were on my face and were now squishing my baby fat. "ouchie, i'm sorry i'll go!" i agreed trying to pry his hands of the fat that never left my face

"good." he smiled, satisfied.

but here i was at this moment, still unable to get that scenario out of my mind. it was as if my brain put it on rewind which was both a curse and a gift at the same time.

this was so stupid, why can't i get him out of my mind.

i turned over, to face my alarm clock that was showing the time; 1:34am.

is it even possible to be an even bigger clown than i am right now?

the dding of my phone notification jolted me from my deep thought. who would even text me at this time? i checked my notifs expecting it to be jun and his cursed memes again.

but it wasn't, it was something that my heat drop that very moment