khiphop + rnb One Shots

NAFLA- onoffonoff

 Y/N's P.O.V 

"Again with this bullshit, Nicholas," I said as I looked at my boyfriend. 

"What fucken bullshit (Y/N), I just fucken came home what the fuck do you want me to do."  I looked at him and I was so mad and just frustrated. 

" That's exactly it, YOU just fucken came home after weeks of not hearing back from you and you not showing up."  I was tired of this. It's constantly like this between us and I was done the first time but I always come back. 

He sighed and looked at me. He ignored me and tried to walk into our bedroom. Well, mine now. I stepped in front of him. 

"let me through (Y/N), I had a rough night. let's just talk tomorrow. " 

Again see what I mean. I'm done. 

"NO, we are going to talk about it right fucken now." He looked at me angrily. 

"FINE what the fuck do you want me to say. That after weeks of not talking you would get the hint or that I was fucken busy at work" I looked at him, my eyes water as I fight back tears not just from sadness but of anger. 

"I see so, you thought that just by not fucking saying anything I was just going to fucken leave?" 

"YES, Maybe I don't fucken know" 

"What the fuck do you mean. YOu fucken don't know, YOU fucken said to take a hint. You either want me to stay or go. It cant be fucken both." 

"I DONT FUCKEN KNOW, FUCK" he sat down in the couch hands on his head frustrated and mad. 

I stood there confused at the situation and looked at him. Tears now streaming down my face. 

"fine, I'll make the fucken decision for you." I grabbed my purse and phone from the room and was about to open the door and leave. When I felt two arms around my waist. He tightens his grip as if I would disappear in thin air. I had tears in my eyes and tried my best to push his hands away and let go of his grip.  

"let go, Nicholas," I said my voice was barely audible. Instead, he tightens his grip and his face was on my back. I felt a few drops of water on my back. He was also in tears. 

"Please, don't leave me," he said as his voice cracked a bit. 

"you told  me to take the hint."

"I know you need me, I know I'm not that easy but babe I'm on my knees" 

I was crying now. our relationship was strong when we first started dating. We had the usual arguments, dates and we fell for each other. Then it went downhill. When did it go so bad? how did it end up like this? I love him with all my heart and it hurts every time we break up. 

" I  love you so much Nicholas, and it hurts so much. So fucken much when we do this. It feels like its everyday. That we go through this and it hurts." I was balling my eyes out as I said this. 

"I love you too and I know it hurts me so fucken much going through this with you, I just want you next to me. " 

" I just.. I can't fucken deal with us again." 

"Please, don't leave" 

"I love you soo much, please." 

"I love you too Nicholas, I just hate this so much."  He let go of me and turned me around. I was now facing him. He had tears in his eyes. we were both in tears. My heart hurt so much. He looked at me and my lips and kissed me. 

I kissed back lost in emotion. The kiss now turned into a full make-out section and each time it would get sloppier. we were now unclothed as we went to the bedroom. 

It happened again. Make-up sex was nothing new to me. Every time we fight or break up we always end up naked in each other arm. I know it isn't healthy, we are just broken. 

It was morning and I got up and got ready. And left. 

its always like this. 

it's on off on off and I'm done. 

He never says sorry it's like that word in our relationship is unspoken at this point and I always need up forgiving him 

Every time we try to talk about it, it ends up like this. 

I have to let go but I can't I love him. 

And maybe that's is why I'm in this mess 

sometimes I just want to scream but no sound is heard. 

I love him and hate him. 

A/N:  I know it sucks and I'm sorry. small one-shot but maybe there will be a second part who knows. Anyway, I hope everyone is doing great during this time. Remember to stay safe and stay home and take care of yourself and your family members. And remember that it will all be okay and soon will be over. If anyone wants to talk I'm here for it.  Don't forget to vote/follow/comment or share. Until next time 

-Rebeltrbl130