Survival Of The Fittest/By Taran

Chapter 18

At the sector, I was alone with George who was putting away his uniform and cleaning up the arrows, more importantly the arrow that I shot at the little girl. I sit on the bench by the lockers, not being able to move. If it wasn't already, the world seemed to be paused.

I wanted to yell at George, run to Finn and tell him what happened, curse Xavier out, but I no longer had the power to make myself do any of it. Nor did I care to. I look down at my hand, rubbing my thumb on the speaker of the talkie Finn had given me. Remembering he said to call him anytime something didn't feel right. I didn't. I chuck the talkie at the wall by the sink George was washing the arrow in.

"Fuck, Millie" George drops the arrow in the sink, turns around to shake his head at me. The talkie shattered into pieces on the ground.

"Sorry," I murmur. He grabs a towel to dry his hands.

"You had to do what you had to do. Now, take off the uniform, we'll be heading for supper. Xavier will be happy to hear you did what he asked. You need to earn his trust back," he throws the towel into a basket full of unwashed uniforms.

"Let me stay in here for a few more minutes," My head hung low, massaging my temples. The headache felt like a brick was placed on top of my head, and wrapped up with duct tape, over and over again. So much pressure.

George shakes his head, "I can't let you do that. Not with the door to the yard right there."

"Why would I try something now and not then when I could have saved her? Me trying to run away now would be a waste," I get up suddenly to take off my uniform, without a care in the world, making George quickly turn around so he wasn't able to see me undress, he whispers 'oh god' taking him by surprise as I did that.

I throw the disgusting, smelly uniform into the same basket, and walk out the door in front of George heading for supper.

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The room filled with loud noise of every utensil possible and chatters of every single person in that room, music being played by their very own community band. All these people are living pretty normal lives from what normal is nowadays. They probably came to supper after having a nice bath or after playing some board games with their kids, getting all dressed up and ready to gather for supper.

And here I was. I had just killed someone. My body still paralyzed, my hair smelling of sweat, and the disgusting scent of the worn, unclean uniform. Here I was angry at the fact that everyone was happy, or seemed to be happy. They had no idea what happened behind these walls just a few minutes ago.

I nod to tell George I was heading toward a table in the corner, that basically had no one around it. It was located in the dark, quieter area that no one seemed to give a shit about. I sat with my back against the wall, looking out to everyone munching on their food, for which I had to wait for anyway until they all were done.

I spot Finn plating the meal as the other cooks went around passing it from table to table, or for whenever someone had their hands up for seconds or thirds. He looks adorable in his hat and white coat, dressed like an actual chef. As he looks my way, his smile grows, and he holds up the plate with one hand to show me and winks. 'Just like a natural' is probably what he wanted to tell me. He was a natural, the way he was moving around the room and kitchen like this was exactly what should have been his position in the first place. I slightly lift my hand to wave to him.

"You don't mind me sitting here, I hope," Emma sits herself in front of me, she has on a stunning tight red dress, showing off her thighs, with her blonde hair curled tightly.

"I don't have a choice," I have no energy to communicate with stupidity, "What do you want, Emma?"

"Honestly, I just want to sit down with an old friend, I guess," Her back against the wall now too, she twirls her curls, "So, is he actually your man now or is it just for fun? Because he is quite sexy. He's not as sexy as Isaac, but damn I would so go for him."