The Love Story I Got, Sincerely Snow
by @snowberrysmiles
To start off, the idea of this story was great. It was very original. Actually, everything in the story seemed to be opposite of stereotypes. Though, i think you focused so hard on not being stereotypical that your book was more like a reverse stereotype. It gave the same vibe as an average high school story. I really like how you built your main character, but everything else just didn't fit. I don't want to be picky, but it was all really immature, even though the characters were supposed to be 18. They acted like 12 year olds. That may seem harsh, but I couldn't get over it. Secondly, I love seeing twins in stories. Many of them are amazing, such as the twins in I'll Give You The Sun, etc. Though, I knew you didn't do your research. You see, I'm a twin. My mom's a twin. I know about them, and when you said they were three seconds apart... no. Sorry, but no. That's not possible in any way. Mine was hurried, and it was a bit more than a minute in between. Please do your research. A couple of other things were like this. Just because you do fiction doesn't mean you don't study on it. Now, one thing that just needs to be clear is the time frame. I got confused by the rival town aspect of your story. It was hard to relate when everything was so odd. I couldn't catch when the story took place. Please add this into your descriptions. Finally, the grammar was pretty bad. There were many run-ons and unnecessary capitalization. There was also a lack of commas and periods. I say just get more involved with your story. Show the same love you do when you're researching and editing as you do when you're writing.
CZYTASZ
Review Book (any genre)
LosoweWhat you need to know: 1. Must be your own work obviously 2. Everything I say is constructive criticism. I will be honest. (Here's a secret: There's no such thing as a perfect story) 3. I'm open to fan fiction. It'll just take me a while to review...
