Lost In Our Memories (Dramione story) [COMPLETED]

Chapter 40

Three months had passed since Hermione left the hospital. News of Draco resurfacing reached her a few days later. He made sure to stay away from the flat or the Ministry and Hermione never looked for him either. She still felt confused and uneasy. The letter Blaise had given her made her feel even more uncertain of her own feelings. At some point she was sure of the hate she had for him, but then she found herself thinking about him with tenderness and regret. Whenever that would happen, Hermione would scold herself for being too weak and sentimental.

He has lied to me. He has scarred me both mentally and physically. I do not care about him... I do not want to see him ever again!

She would chant these thoughts in her head as if they were a mantra meant to protect her.

The only person she trusted enough to share these conflicting thoughts with was Ginny. One day she had worked herself into such a whirl of emotions, that even Ginny barely managed to calm her down.

"Ginny, I am so confused. I don't know what to do and it's scaring the living daylights out of me." Hermione said in a weak voice, her eyes tearing up.

"There, there." Ginny said calmingly, gathering Hermione into a warm hug. "Not knowing what to do can be frightening, but you're Hermione Granger. You always know what to do." She added with a small smile. "Maybe not now, not even tomorrow, but eventually you will know what to do. Just give it a little bit of time."

"You think so?" Hermione asked in a hopeful tone.

"I know so. What you went through is enough to drive anyone mad. It's understandable that it takes you so much time to make sense of it all." Ginny said with a small reassuring nod.

They both remained silent. Hermione buried her head in Ginny's embrace. It felt good to have someone to talk to, someone to trust. After finding out about Draco's lies, she felt scared and unable to trust anyone. Nevertheless, her closest friends, the ones she got through a war with, had always been there for her and she knew that. Therefore, when Harry and Ginny came to talk to her she never acted with bitterness. She understood why they chose to keep Draco's secret, it was after all for her own happiness. Then why couldn't she understand Draco? Why was she harboring such resentment towards him?

"You know Ginny," Hermione began suddenly. "At times I wonder whether it would have been better never to remember the past."

"You don't mean that." Ginny said softly. "You always felt part of you missing. Sure, not knowing certain things might make life easier sometimes..." Ginny stopped, giving Hermione a strange look. "I don't approve or agree with Malfoy's methods, but I know he did it with the best intentions."

Hermione scoffed, looking away from her friend.

"Yes, I know he's an idiot. Everybody knows that. I am sure even he has started to figure that out by now." Ginny said, rolling her eyes with a huff. "Malfoy is an idiot and what he did was wrong. But what if... just what if that was the best he could come up with? You know he's never really been brave or open with his feelings."

"I really would have preferred if he hadn't gone past the slicing curse. If he hadn't Obliviated me then..."

"Would you have believed him?" Ginny cut her off. "Would you have trusted him after that display? Just think about it." She added quickly, seeing Hermione's reluctant expression. "You know what he was. He was a Death Eater, who's family had done every possible wrong until that day. You saw him tormenting you all those years, you know he tried to kill Dumbledore and he even let Death Eaters into the castle. Not to mention that after all that, the idiot still tried to get back at Harry during the Battle of Hogwarts, almost getting himself burnt alive." Ginny finished with an angry huff.