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In The Beginning...

In The Beginning…

I felt someone smack the back of my head and I turned to glare at my best friend, Jake Preston.

“Did you tell her yet?” He quirked an eyebrow questioningly, pulling me out of my Anah Miller induced daydream. I shake my head in response and watch as Jake frowns. “Sutter… just man up already and tell her. It’s not that hard. Look, I’ll demonstrate. Anah, I love you.”

It was the Friday of our first week back at school after summer break and already Jake was on my case about Anah. For the past two years I have been obsessing about Anah Miller, the most perfect and most beautiful creature ever to have graced the Earth. I’ve never told her how I feel about her, mainly because I know that she’s never like me back. After all, I’m me.

Anah is quiet and unassuming and likes to fly under the radar, whereas I’m the opposite. I’m the popular captain of the soccer team that everyone seems to know, although people don’t seem to know what my real name is. Ever since freshman year I’ve been known by my last name, and never my first- I wonder how many actually know that my name is Matthew?

Would Anah know?

A smile creeps onto my face as I think about her, and her smile, and her eyes, and… everything about her really. I’m not sure how she got so perfect, but she is. Ok, she has her flaws and she’s incredibly impatient, but she’s just so…

I groan. “I can’t tell her,” I finally say to Jake. I’ve been stuck in this limbo ever since Halloween of sophomore year, ever since she drunkenly kissed me. “I’m not right for her, Jake. She’ll take one look at me and bolt for the door.”

“How are you so sure?” Jake mumbles as he takes another bite out of his lunch. I wait for him to stop chewing and then motion for him to continue. “Ok, think of it like this- she kissed you at the party, didn’t she? Why would she have done that if she didn’t like you?”

“Because she was drunk,” I tell him, although I’m not entirely sure if that was the case. Maybe the alcohol I tasted on her lips was actually the alcohol I tasted on mine. Damn it, why was this so confusing? “Anyway, even if she did like me,” I begin to rationalize, “she doesn’t like me now. In fact, after that kiss, I’d go so far as to say that she hates me.”

“Who hates you?” A chirpy voice asks as Jakes girlfriend comes to sit with us. Eden Miller is Anah’s twin sister, and even though they’re not identical, they do look scarily similar. They have the same brown hair, although Anah’s is lighter, and the same brown eyes, even though Eden’s are darker. “Earth to Sutter? Who hates you?”

“Your sister,” Jake automatically answers, before his eyes widen and he shoots me an apologetic glance. At least he had the good grace to mouth ‘sorry.’

Eden snorts. “Anah? She doesn’t hate you. It’s you that hates her.”

Jake and I share a disbelieving look. There is no way that I could ever hate Anah and having Eden think that is just wrong. I know I do a pretty good job of hiding my real feelings, maybe to the point where people think I’m cold and emotionless, but I worship Anah. I could never feel anything for her except pure love. Why would anyone believe that I hate her?