Lonely (a falsettos college AU)

Excerpts of a doctor: part 1

I would just like to say psych.

Also when I went to sleep last night I had an excellent idea for my second story so (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Medical Journal of Dr Mendel Weisenbachfeld

I recognised it, the same look. Whizzer watched Marvin the way I watched Trina.

When he asked about what Marvin told me, I could not tell him. Maybe it would have turned out differently if I did.

Marvin was drunk, and they say alcohol is like a truth serum so I guessed that what Marvin told me was too personal for me to tell. It's Marvin's truth he should be the one to speak it.

He had conflicting feelings, which seems about right considering the fact that he was questioning his sexuality.

He said Whizzer made him feel smart, I thought I understood what that meant until I met him. Marvin described him as a pretty boy with no substance. Someone who only cares about their appearance. But the Whizzer I met seemed to defy everything Marvin told me.

He said Whizzer could be sweet, but mean and I recognised this from Marvin's character, he was describing himself as Whizzer. It took me a second to understand why he was making Whizzer a reflection of himself, but it helped him justify sleeping with him in the first place. It also was a subconscious attempt at flirting, the brain tends to want to mimic the person they are attracted to, Marvin wanted whizzer to mimic him whether he did or not, I will never know, we were never that close.

He is sometimes worthless, that was what Marvin told me. That was the first statement I agreed with, Whizzer seemed to have very little self worth. That's probably not the way Marvin meant it, but to some extent he was right.

And even now, over 20 years later I remember thinking that about Whizzer every time I conversed with him, although looking back now, he seemed to be the sane one out of all of us. He was confident, open, sex positive yet the rest of us acted as if that was a bad thing. But he did not realise how important he was to anyone, Which explains part of why he did it.

It also explained why Marvin loved, no loves him. I asked him once if he loved him, he said "sorta kinda". It is a powerful thing love, it can be blind, it can tell a million stories, but it can also be deceitful and cruel. I discussed love with him after he got married, he told me that he found love crazy, often boring and that it is pretty often debris.

I myself did not understand that, I never married, my work is far to important, although upon mentioning dating with Marvin he asked whether my work was just an alibi.

In someways he did my job better than I myself did.