You (Changlix)

21

tw: Panic Attack and a lil bit of homophobia

I fell to the floor, tears clouding my eyes. I couldn't hold it in anymore. I couldn't breathe. I could feel my friends by my side trying to calm me down, but it wasn't working. Nothing that they were doing or saying was helping me. I still couldn't breathe. Their voices were faint. I couldn't even make out what they were saying. Then, I could feel Mino carefully lifting me up. My head was pressed against his shoulder and he was holding me tight.

"Felix, listen to my voice. Listen to my breathing. I know you can do it, you're strong. Count to three while you're breathing in, and then hold it for 2. Breathe out for 3, and keep doing that until it becomes normal."

So I did what he said. It was actually helping me. Nobody ever bothered to help when something like this happened, so the fact that Minho even tried to help made me feel a little better. Finally after a few seconds of doing that, my breathing was back to normal.

"I'm alright. I'm back."

They all hugged me tight. Jeongin was even crying a little. Nobody dared to speak, the silence was just comfortable. That was until I heard yelling.

"You cheated on me? How fucking dare you! And with a fucking guy? You fucking fag. You disgust me. Along with your nasty ass boyfriend!"

Those words alone were enough to make me forget how to breathe. Hyunjin noticed, and started rubbing my back. It made me feel safer. I couldn't even process what happened. I didn't want to think about it. It was too much for my head to handle. I started to feel dizzy, so I started tugging on Seungmin's hoodie sleeve.

"Can we please go inside? I feel really dizzy."

So they helped me up and sat me down on the couch. I saw Minho and Woojin rushing into the kitchen. They were probably going to make some food. I was too tired and dizzy to even protest. I really wasn't hungry, and it wasn't a lie this time.

While Chan held a cold rag to my forhead, there was a knock on the door. I saw Hyunjin go open the door.

"What do you want?"

"I wanted to talk to Felix."

"He isn't feeling the best right now. Let me ask him if he's alright." He turned around and faced me.

"You okay to talk to Bin?"

"Yeah, but I need some help getting up. I might fall."

"Alright I got you."

Hyunjin helped me up and took me outside to talk with Changbin. I don't know what he wants to talk about because I really don't want to deal with anything that happened in the last 12 hours. Before anything was said, he pulled me into a rib-crushing hug.

"I'm so sory, Felix. I'm so sorry. This is all my fault. I should have never did anything. I'm so dumb. I'm so sorry."

"It's not your fault. Don't blame yourself."

"But it feels like it. I kissed you. If I hadn't done it then this wouldn't be happening..."

"Do you regret it? I don't. I enjoyed it. I wanted it."

"I dont't."

"Good. Now shut up and kiss me again."

So thats what he did.