blue gasoline ✿ nomin

056

Jaemin awoke slowly, fluttering his weighted eyelids until he could hold them open. In the time it took him to fully wake up, he knew he was in the hospital. What had happened last night for sure landed him here, and he felt his stomach churn as he reminisced about the consequences of his actions.

When he turned his head to the side, he was shocked to see both of his parents on the other side of the room, conversing quietly about something. There was also a nurse standing next to his bed, who still hadn't noticed his regaining of consciousness.

Most people would've called out desperately for their parents. Their birth givers, the ones who were supposed to be their loving protectors. But Jaemin felt no connection to his parents. If anyone was here, he wanted it to be Jeno and Gram.

"Nurse," he croaked, voice straggled from lack of moisture.

The man snapped his head towards Jaemin, as did both of his parents, but he paid no mind to the latter two.

"How are you feeling?" the nurse asked almost too nicely.

"Thirsty."

"Okay, I'll alert the doctor and I'll be right back with some water," he smiled before leaving the room.

Now he was alone with his parents. It was strange, them all being in one room together without it being for some kind of event. It was awkward as they all tried to decide who was going to speak up first.

Jaemin's pleasant mother took it upon herself to start out.

"Na Jaemin, what the hell—"

"Haseul," Mr.Na interrupted with a cold glare. He might not have been the most present father, but that didn't mean he loved his son any less. Jaemin was his own flesh and blood that he tried desperately to keep content by providing an extravagant lifestyle, but now that exact boy was lying right in front of him with tubes jabbed into various veins. "I'm sorry we weren't there for you," he finally whispered.

Jaemin wasn't going to say it was okay. Although he didn't necessarily struggle because of the lack of his parents, it would've been nice to have. Instead of trying to make his regretful father and bitchy mother feel better, he cleared his throat and asked, "Did you guys call Gram?"

"Yeah," Mr.Na replied softly. He knew his mother had been more of a parent to Jaemin than he or his wife ever had, and he had expected this very question to arise. "Officer Lee is in the waiting room," he added, not missing the way his son's features lit up for a split second before they turned guilty.

"Can you go get him?"

The man nodded, taking his wife's hand and leaving the room. He didn't deserve to be in that room with his son that he had neglected. Hopefully, Officer Lee could provide something that he couldn't.

Jaemin sighed as soon as the door shut behind them. How could he have managed to put himself in this situation? It was never supposed to go this far.

The many thoughts he was having swam around his brain like a disease until the door finally opened again several minutes later and a tired-looking Jeno stalked into the room. They stared at each other for a brief moment before the officer strode across the room and enveloped Jaemin in a gentle hug as if he would break if he squeezed too hard.

"I'm so sorry," the older apologized, voice thick with unshed tears. He had promised himself he wasn't going to cry as Jaemin's parents told him everything, but it was a struggle to uphold that vow.

"I'm sorry too," the blue-haired boy whispered, holding onto Jeno as if his entire life depended on it.

"I should've been there for you," Jeno croaked, guilt consuming his entire body. He thought what he had been doing was right, but all the information revealed to him told him otherwise.

The teen closed his eyes. Jeno had tried to be there for him so many times, but ultimately it was he who pushed the older away every single time. There was no one to blame but himself. "You were," he consoled.

"Not enough," the officer rasped. "I knew you were doing drugs, but I didn't even know about all the other stuff."

Jaemin paled. He hoped he wasn't talking about what he thought he was talking about. "What...other stuff?" he asked carefully, even though he was quite sure he already knew the answer to that.

The ravenette grimaced as he pulled away from the hug. He didn't want to say it. Saying it and seeing his lover's face fall because he's going to find out that he knows about it wasn't something he wanted to experience. He had to say it though; he couldn't just cover this up like he did the drugs. "The... self-harm," he finally managed to say.

The younger felt like he was going to vomit. Frantically, he pressed his hand to where the wounds were, only to feel bandages across all of them. When he finally met Jeno's eyes once again, his heart broke. He wasn't supposed to find out, not like this. Not only that but if everyone knew now...there was no way he was getting out of therapy.

"They're going to make me go, aren't they?" he deadpanned, seemingly detached from his body.

After a long, heavy pause, Jeno answered: "Yeah."

"No, no I don't want to! Jeno, you can't let them force me! I'm okay!" the blue-haired boy panicked, eyes searching desperately for something in Jeno's eyes that would give him reassurance.

"Jaemin—"

"No! I'm eighteen, I don't have to do shit! I'm not—"

"Jaemin, you don't have a choice," the officer interrupted firmly. "You can't go on like this, you just can't," he added in a softer, more pleading tone.

At this, the teen began to cry softly. This was it, this was rock bottom. The one place he swore he would never go, was now where he was stuck until further notice.

Jeno's heart was crushed as he maneuvered into the bed next to his boyfriend, where he cradled the young boy as he cried. "Look at me," he ordered gently, to which the blue-haired boy slowly let his teary eyes to meet Jeno's own damp ones. "It's going to be hell for a little bit, but I'm going to be right here. We'll get through this, baby, I promise," he consoled sincerely.

The younger sniffled and nodded. He had hopes he could make it through with Jeno by his side. The aforementioned male had already proved that he was there whenever he was needed, so now it was just a matter of perseverance.

"I love you," the ravenette whispered, pressing a lingering kiss on his boyfriend's forehead.

"I love you too, so much."