Studio 8h - John Mulaney FanFic

John - But what am I so afriad of?

"Will you talk to me now?" I ask after her performance of a horribly done song. "You asked me to go-"

"John, I'm happy right now ok? That doesn't happen very often."

"What do you mean?" I lean on the bar as she pathetically looks up.

"It's been 2 years, 2 years. I was supposed to make something for myself. I just write skits, for someone else to perform. My dad is in a shack in Louisiana rotting. I was supposed to make something for myself. Find him a cure. But there is no fucking cure for cancer. So I go out for drinks. And wonder what my life would be like if I could lose this job."

"You want to quit your job?"

"Absolutely not, but sometimes, I wonder what it would be like if I could. What would happen. I could be the director of a museum, or let my self be happy without feeling guilty."

"Peyton-" I begin before she puts her finger up to stop me. "You don't get any say in how I should live my life. I've given you my life and you're just standing here feeing sorry for me."

"What do you mean. We're "office buddies" remember? I don't want to take your life-"

"Damnit John, I'm in love with you! Happy?! I said it. I can't imagine my life with out you. Does that calculate in your head of awesomeness?" 'Awesomeness' is what tips it off that she's still drunk. But the worst part is, that I want it to be true. I want her to be telling the truth, but she would never tell me this being not drunk, and she's probably exaggerating. Right?

"Peyton...I think I should take you home. You've had enough."

"So I did make it all up?" She walks backwards into the bars center, "Bye John. Merry Christmas."

I watch her walk to a group of SNL girls, drowning herself in more tequila, "Did I really hear that correctly?" Colin asks, walking to the spot at the bar next to me.

I nod, "Yeah...yeah I think it just did."

Colin whistles, "I never thought she would've. Always thought she cared to much to throw that on someone, I guess drunk Peyton has other plans." He laughs thanking the bartender for his new beer bottle

"Heh..yeah," I look down at the ice cubes left in the plastic cup, then realize, "wait what? That's how she actually feels?"

"Drunk mans words are a sober mans thoughts." He take a swig, and leans his back on the counter to look at her like I am.

Next Micheal walks over, "Hey man, what's goin' on over here?" He asks standing on the other side of Colin. Them being the Weekend Update Hosts, they were also the dream team.

"John didn't know about Peyton," he casually says over his shoulder.

He stands up, "Did she tell him?" Colin just nods in response. "Really? Wow, is she drunk?" "Oh yeah, hammered. Did you just see that Kelly Clarkson performance?" They both chuckle.

"So, wha'd you say?"

"He offered to drive her home..."

Micheal winces at the thought of my actions, "Rookie mistake. Mulaney, she's from small town Louisiana, that girl doesn't need a ride home, or you to tell her she's to drunk! No, she just wants to know how you feel."

"I think I love her," I look over at the pair. Us three standing the same way.

"Then what are you so afraid of?" Colin counters, I look at her laughing with a group of writers, and in that moment I realize, I'm afraid of everything.

•••

I knock on the door, and no answer. I knock again, no answer, so I take to the doorbell.

"I'm coming Jesus Christ!" She yells from the inside. When she opens the door I see her black sweat pants and faded Saints jersey, "Hey, what's up?"

"You don't have a hangover?"

"I don't get hangovers. It's freezing outside wanna come in?"

"No, no I'm ok. But um, I've been thinking about what you said last night."

"Will you please just come inside? My fingers are about to fall off."

"No, I just needed to tell you..."

"It's like 10 degrees, John."

"Damnit Peyton, I'm in love with you."

Her crossed arms fall at her side with her jaw, "I'm sorry, what?"

"I have since you insulted my Lion King Mug but we were working together, and then we became friends, and then best friends, and I never got my opportunity, and then last night-"

"Woah woah woah," she stops me. "What happened last night?"

"You don't remember?" She shakes her head. "You went through this whole passionate speech, it doesn't matter. What matters, is how you respond."

She lets go of the door and laughs, "I told you...Did I tell you..." I hesitantly nod as she continues laughing. "Of course I did...John, I'm kinda in the middle of something right now. Can I talk to you tonight?"

I feel my eyebrows scrunch in confusion, "You just invited me inside."

"Because you looked purple. You've said your peace, you can go now."

"Y-yeah." I step down one of the snow covered steps, but quickly turn back, "Can I at least take you on a date?"

She smiles as she puts half her body behind the door, "Pick me up at 6." And then she closes it, us both smiling. I don't take it off for the rest of the day.