Serene Affairs

18.1 | guilt-chaos

V H R E A

I want to feel the pain, not guilt. That is what I was thinking all the plenty time when Rusty Pants decided to take me on a dreadful walk, pleasant it would have been if it were someone else instead of him.

I was so confused between the fact that I should be upset over the information that I lost my first kiss, my first eloquent experience of thrill and love, that too to a person whom I loathe the most. Or, certitude that I am responsible for a grave accident to the only person I am execrating the most, which may take a downhill turn of events of his life. What if he would have died there?

The thought itself brings a rash shiver in my nerves, like the sight of intestines hanging out of ones belly. Of course I am not a cruel witch who could kill someone only for stealing my first kiss, not even Cinderella's step mother would do it.

Gabriel was giving me a gaze I couldn't comprehend, maybe a murderous aura for killing his brother, almost is the salient takeaway here. Though I have never seen him appear as a person who loved his family deeply, of course the opening line is I don't know about him at all. But, when he can be a meaningful tweak, why can't I be a judgmental freak?

Please don't ask me what I was doing with Kriag in his training room, alone. What were you both crackheads up to?

He asked the very second I thought about it. And I didn't have the guts to share the answer. For the first time in life either I was feeling embarrassed or in simple words, emotionally naked.

"Vhrea, can you do me a favor?"

He called me Vhrea. And no I can't tell him exactly that I was having a touch affair with his brother's lips before the deathly accident happened.

But somehow I found myself nodding a yes. What the hell am I even doing? What if he drugs me and force me to spill the beans of my life?

"Come with me for grocery shopping." Gabriel asked in quite an awkward voice and I had to save my neck from being snapped apart from its body.

That was quite an astonishing request as a favor that too in a situation we were stuck in. Was he trying to comfort me? Or, confront you?

"Are you hungry?" Rusty pants. I couldn't help but ask because of his out of the box request. And here I was worried that he might be pissed at me for murdering his brother. Doesn't he care for his brother?

Not everyone is lucky to have a Jules in their life. Even if people are going to manufacture all the chocolates in their home and put for sale they aren't going to find a brother like Julian. He is just precious and of course he doesn't need to know this, though.

Omma shouldn't have come here but unfortunately I was the one who gave the precise location of the patient's whereabouts, in haste, on our way to the hospital when she had called me to inform about attending some Organic sweet party, another of her socially-environment-nurturing programs.

And now my over the top Mother would be in another strong and undeniable assumption that indeed I cared for Kriag and we were doing fine in dating, only if she knew about the venom of guilt overcoming in my veins.

The scary conclusion about all this was yet to be discussed. Now Omma is going to brag about destiny for no reasons like connecting the events of both me and Kriag falling ill at the same time and this is supposed to be one of the soulmate things, like every time Omma goes through the same hard time whenever Daddy dearest is on the verge of killing someone in his frustration.

And only if I had the energy to imagine of what is going to happen when Omma meets the psychic Adaego and starts discussing my strenuously healing life.