voodoo doll // c.hood

37; everything I didn't say

A M I T Y

My steps are quick as I pace from one side of the living room to the other and anxiously wait for Calum to arrive in just under one hour. With each tick of the clock, the pit in my stomach grows bigger and bigger. I always hated that feeling.

What did I have to be nervous about? Besides the fact that a boy who has changed my life dramatically in a matter of months will soon be arriving at my door and standing on my very own welcome mat.

Oh! And the fact that this could potentially be the end of us. As in the official end where we say that we could totally be friends but the awkwardness is too unbearable so it results in us just never talking ever again.

Today is the only opportunity to fix us, to mend our relationship. And that's only if we both want that. It can't be a one-sided thing, I mean it's a two way street.

I walk at a speedy pace to the other side of the room, turning on my heel to walk in the other direction.

"Amity?" A voice calls out from behind. It causes me to jump and stop in my tracks. I turn around to find the source, my mother. "What on earth are you doing?"

"I'm just pacing back and forth, as you do." I say casually.

Mum slings her bag over her shoulder and shoves her keys and purse into it.

"You only pace like this when you crazy nervous about something. What is it that's making you so nervous?" She asks.

"You've noticed that?" I ask, avoiding her question.

"It's kind of hard not to. Now tell me what's bugging you."

"A friend- just a friend- is coming over today. We are suppose to have a serious talk...very serious." I begin to pace again but in a shorter distance this time. I tap my finger against my chin as I think.

"Is it your boyfriend? Cameron was it? That one that dropped you home one day."

I come to a stop yet again, turning to face my mother.

"Yes." I answer, and that's all I answer. I start up again, pacing across the room. "It's Calum."

"Then why are you so worried?"

"He's not my boyfriend."

It clicks together in her brain. Now she gets why I am so worried. She understands. I can tell by the way her facial expression has changed that she has figured it out.

"If you guys are trying to work out your relationship," she sits on the arm of the couch with her hands redding in her lap, "then it is better to do it now then later. Rip it off like a bandaid. This stuff needs to be said so just get it over with and then you'll know where you both stand. You won't be stuck feeling lost or conflicted."

I stop yet again.

"Really?"

She stands up and places a hand on each of my shoulders, making direct eye contact from where she stands.

"Yes, although this type of conversation is a tad nerve racking, it needs to be said. It has to be done and it will be better for the both of you in the long run."

I nod and quietly utter a thank you.

"Now I have to go. I got a shift at the bar so I'll be home late tonight." She rummages through her bag to find her keys. Once she does, she head for the door. "Oh and Amity," she calls out, looking over her shoulder yet still grasping the door knob. "Good luck," she smiles sweetly and leaves, shutting the door behind her.