CHAPTER 12

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FAITH POV:

''Oooohh!'' I gasped, jumping out of my skin when someone grabbed my arm. I turned to see Summer Rae waving her hands frantically, and trying to get my attention. I looked at her funny for a second, before pressing STOP on the treadmill I was running on that morning in the hotels gym, then took my headphones out.

''Wh-what's wrong?'' I asked out of breath.

''Haven't you heard?'' she asked wide eyed.

''Heard what?''

''Dusty Rhodes died early this morning in his home state of Orlando Florida''

My hands immediately flew up to my mouth in shock! ''Oh my god! Really?!'' I cried.

Summer just nodded.

No way! Dusty's dead? I couldn't believe it! I mean I'd only met him three times in my entire career, but oh what a man! I just can't believe he's gone! This was sure as hell going to put a dark cloud over the wrestling world. He was a ledgend, and he was loved so much by everybody!

''You ok?'' Summer asked quietly.

''Yeah...yeah, I'm ok, I'm just shocked that's all, I mean...it's Dusty you know? He can't be dead'' I said, staring blankly at her in disbelief.

''I know right'' Summer said sadly ''we found out ourselves just ten minutes ago'' she told me ''AJ went ballistic when he heard the news! Dusty was his biggest idol as a kid'' she said softly.

''Poor AJ'' I said, looking sad for him ''oh god, and poor Dustin and Cody too!'' I cried, remembering his two sons which he was now leaving behind ''my god they must be absolutely broken losing their father like that, how awful'' I sobbed, feeling a huge wave of sadness come over as I thought about them both. I stepped off the treadmill now, and was welcomed with a warm embrace from Summer.

''We should all go find them and give our condolences'' I said.

''Absolutely'' she agreed ''Its go tell AJ and Roman''

Summer and I both quickly headed upstairs to go tell the boys, on the way bumping into Charlotte Flair who was stood in the hallway looking down at her cell...

''Hey'' I called out to her ''Did you hear?''

She turned and looked at me impatiently.

''...about Dusty Rhodes?'' I continued.

She sighed an irritated sigh ''Yes Faith, of course I heard. He and my father were the greatest of friends'' she said looking down at me.

''Well, I'm really sorry he passed'' I told her ''um, please kindly give my condolences to your fath-''

She rudely put her hand up to my face, to stop me from talking ''we don't need your sympathy Faith, this is between real legends...something you'll never be'' she snarled, and took a step closer to me ''I guarantee you Faith, no matter how many great show stopping, charitable, even history making things you do in your career from here on out...you'll always be known as the girl who cried rape'' she said, looking me up and down in disgust, before sauntering off down the corridor toward the lifts.

I batted back the sting in my eyes, while taking a deep breath trying not get emotional.

''Hey, don't listen to her okay'' Summer said, gently placing her arm round my shoulder ''...she doesn't know what she's talking about, she's just upset, that's all...it'll pass''

I knew Summer was right, but her words still hurt.

I know I didn't have a legendary father that everyone would instantly look up to me because of, nor was I blessed enough to have even been born into a wrestling family...but I was me. Just me. A young girl doing her best to prove herself, and be taken seriously, in a world surrounded by generations of talent, including Charlotte herself. I was sorry Dusty died, but I too had the right to grieve just like everyone else.

And as for the ''girl who cried rape'' thing...I had already made history! If it wasn't for me and my bravery, who knows how many more women would have been hurt at the hands of Seth Rollins. So yeah, I made a few mistakes along the way, but in doing so, I faced my demons and found out who I really was...can you say the same Charlotte?

*****

It wasn't something I allowed myself to think about anymore, because the guilt still burned a hole through me, like fire into ice.

But on the few occasions I did, I would always think just how strong Paige and Dean had stayed for one another, during the stressful period that would eventually be their last days in WWE. It was because of me their careers were cut short, and it killed me every second of everyday that they weren't around. I'd lost my best friend and Roman had lost his brother, and I deserved to suffer for it, every single day.

Even though I'd now tucked it all in a safe part of my memory, nothing I did could ever help me forget what happened. I couldn't put into words the heartache I felt over what I did to Dean, and the horrible pain that followed over losing the essence of my friendship with Paige. I don't think even Roman knew just how deep my feelings lied, even though he was my absolute rock when they both announced their departure from the WWE. I remember going to bed that night and crying my eyes out for hours on end, with not even Roman and two 10 packs of my favourite cigarettes being enough to take the pain away.

After the whole deal went down, and people began slowly finding out that it was actually Seth who had attacked me and not Dean, I truly believed that things would get better. Plus with my book coming out a little over a month later, there was no doubt in my mind it would fix all the damage that had been caused.

But alas, the backlog of damage done to Dean's career became too much for him in the end. If I'm honest, I'm actually still very impressed at how well both he and Paige tried to make things work out, but I guess it was like trying to mend pieces of a broken heart, with another broken heart.

And even though we had all promised to stay in touch, I knew in my own heart of hearts that things would never be the same again. Sure we'd occasionally FaceTime, and talk or text on the phone, but sadly our once close bonded friendship was no more. I know they both resented me so much for the way I handled things, and I trust me when I say I resented myself even more than that.

And as if I couldn't feel any worse, Dean had also begun slowly distancing himself from Roman too. My god, sometimes I wish I had never come to the WWE! If I hadn't, they'd all still be friends now, but at the same time...how many more other women would be suffering at the hands of Seth Rollins, if it also wasn't for me-a concept Queen Charlotte would never understand.

I guess sometimes in life you have to make difficult decisions...no matter the cost.

As soon as Seth was sentenced, both Paige and Dean both broke the news of their departure on twitter at the same time, with identical tweets:

''We've seen, we've fought, we've conquered. Tw's company, but three's a crowd. It's been a lunatic of a time, and no matter what the future holds, this is still our house.

#WWE #PaigeandDeanForever❤️''

Myself, Roman, the McMahons and the entire WWE Universe all woke the next morning to their shock departure.

I've hated myself ever since.

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