💖T-Thanks💖 Ishimaru x Reader (2/4)*OLD*

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Trigger warnings!
Self harm, and aftermath of an almost successful suicide.

Yeah, I extended this One, wtf are you gonna do about it.

-LAST UPDATED SEPTEMBER 13TH 2020-

-story start-

You had ended up in a hospital, with your mother not even coming. You looked over to your vitals, being must more stable them it was. Funny how much can happen in just 2 weeks. You had no one but the occasion nurse to check your vitals.
You heard a panicked click of your door, as you looked up. To see someone who wasn't a nurse, or doctor, someone you finally knew.

"L/N! I've been looking all over for you!"

You were shocked, when you saw who it was.

"Ishi- why are you here? How did you even know I was here?"

He looked at you, still breathing heavily from running.

"I asked Tsumiki-Chan if she had seen you at any hospitals. So when she said she would check, and she found you here. I ran over as soon as possible."

  You were shocked, someone had cared to look for you.

"I been looking for you, to tell you that your mom has been dealt with, and to ask why you're here in the first place."

  You looked down to your simi-fresh stitches.l

"I-I pulled some dumb shit."

  He looked at you with shock, never hearing you cuss before.

"I, got my stuff stolen from me, and the only other option was.... Gross. So I stole a knife and-"

  Ishimaru put out a hand, signing for you to stop.

"You, don't need to finish."

  You were gonna apologize for running away like that. But he spoke before you could.

"When did you get in here."

  You tried your best to think back.

"Three days ago, but I've only been couscous for a day in a half. If I keep stable, I'll be out by tomorrow!"

"Why so long?"

  You sighed.

"Well let's just say, it wasn't just the flesh that needed to be fixed."

  You thought back to the few short moments, you had achieved your goal. It was not peaceful, nor sadness, nor happiness, nor love, nor heartbreak, nor pain. It wasn't black, nor white.
  It was, nothing. It wasn't a peaceful nothingness, it was just, nothingness.  The absence of emotions, but the absence of emotions deep inside you still wished to feel.
  That's was one of the only reasons you wanted for the doctors to save you. One of the only reasons you didn't fight back when your once chocked heart. Starting once again to play the piano keys of life.

"L/N, are you okay?"

  You instantly snapped back in.

"Sorry, I was thinking. Before I left, our next project was to write a paper on something we've experienced that changed our life right?"

  He nodded his head.

"Yes! It's due in a week, why do you ask?"

  You looked up, finally knowing what you were gonna write about!

"I know what I'm gonna write about now! Can you hand me my school bag!"

He handed you your school bag and a nurse walked in, telling you that if you wished to leave you could.

"I... told my father about what was going on. So we've gathered your stuff, you'll be staying with us."

  You smiled and nodded, as you signed the discarded papers, and walked out of the hospital. When you got to his house, you took off your shoes, deciding to leave them there this time. You asked if you could talk with him, to finally apologize to him.

"Hey, I'm-I'm Sorry..."

He looked at you with shock, not knowing what you were apologizing for.

"I shouldn't have ran away like that, and I should have answered your text! If I wouldn't have ran away, none of this would have happened and-"

"Nonsense!"

He cut you off mid paragraph, right before you would inedibly start crying.

"You don't need to apologize! If I wanted an apology or really thought you were that rude! I would have told you by now!"

He gave you a pat on the head.

"Besides! What is there to apologize for! Emotions? You can't apologize for your emotions!"

You felt tears form in your eyes, no one was ever been this nice to you before. He went to ask you if you were okay, but you cut him off with a hug. He was shocked for a moment, but he eventually hugged you back. He started to rub your back, making you feel... happy! One of the few emotions you came back to feel.

"L/N, are you okay!"

"Yeah.... it's just that. No one has ever been as nice to me as you have before."

He looked shocked, but in the end related to what you were saying.

"Yeah, I know how that feels."

You didn't know why you were so happy, but you couldn't stop crying. Half of you wanted to stop crying, but part of you didn't want the hug to stop.

"L/N, didn't you say you knew what it you were gonna write about."

You stopped crying, and instantly pulled away.

"YE- I mean yes! I know exactly what I'm gonna write about!"

  You got your notebook, and started writing. You wrote until you passed out at the desk you were writing at.

-word count 890-

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