𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 ∘ Bellamy Blake (on hold indefinitely)

24 • so do I

I know it's taking a while, but I did warn that this was a slow burn.

Also, I love Theo and Bellamy. I think this is definitely one of the more real, natural relationships I've written.

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When I got inside, Bellamy was leaned over a table which had been set up to look like our camp and the surrounding area. He was moving little whittled figures and landmines around to try and make a plan for the morning.

"Hey," I said softly as I stood beside him. I was nervous about being there with him if I were being honest. "Are you okay?"

His head remained hung over the map, "O hasn't forgiven me for that Grounder, you're barely talking to me, and none of them out there understand."

I shook my head with a sigh, "Octavia really cares about Lincoln, and I think you need to accept that, Bellamy. And I'm pretty sure they do understand. But, I'm also pretty sure you scared the shit out of all of them."

"I'm not explaining myself again. The Grounders are coming and fear is the only thing that is keeping them working."

"What about hope?" I threw back.

He finally turned to face me, his eyes looking tired. "I can't give them that."

"You can try," I insisted. When he didn't respond, I felt a small sigh escape me.

I was about to leave when he took my hand in his and stopped me in my tracks. "Why are you avoiding me?"

Looking down, I stared at our hands, before meeting his eyes. I didn't want to waste time lying to him; I had already done that so many times.
"I came to talk to you. We never got to speak about Unity Day and what I said, and what happened after I told you about what happened that night, and everything else. And then I saw Raven leave your tent. That's why I've been avoiding you."

His eyes scanned my face slowly, looking for something. "She came to me, Sutton."

"Whatever," I replied drily.

His voice lowered as his eyes softened, "I'm sorry, Theo."

The way he said my name almost made me shiver.
"I don't care, Bellamy."

I went to remove my hand, but he only pulled me closer before I got the opportunity. Our bodies were less than thirty centimetres apart as he looked down at me, his eyes boring into mine.
"Yes, you do. And so do I."

I had no idea how to respond to that. We stood staring at each other as Jasper walked in, gun in hand. He didn't even try to hide his anger towards Bellamy.

"Don't you think I want to go after them, too?" Bellamy asked the boy, taking a step back from me and turning to look at him.

Jasper stopped, "If it was you out there, you think Monty, Maeve, Clarke, or Finn would hide behind these walls?"