familiar ; draco malfoy

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Ramona was the first person awake in the Slytherin dorm on a very cold, very gloomy Sunday. Although saying that she was the first one awake could very well mean that she had, in fact, slept. 

The bags under her eyes bore witness to her sleepless night, the third one in a row.

Last night was by far the worst, she was sure of it. She need to drink in the silence to counteract the fear that threatened to swallow her whole. At night, her darkest fears usually came out to taunt her, and lately it was worse than usual.

It was impossible to see the sky from the Slytherin dorms. The sole thought of the inky black sky usually relaxed her and brought her at ease. Her bed felt claustrophobic, as if the lake was dripping through the windows and filling up her room so slowly she wouldn't notice until she was drowning. She lay there wrapped in her duvet, cocooned by the thick protective buffer of the absolute quiet.

Once the clock ticked somewhere around five, Daphne's snoring commenced and irritated her beyond reason. Deciding to stay in the empty common room instead, Ramona dragged herself out of the dormitory as silently as possible. She was still dressed in her green Slytherin pajamas and wrapped in a large, dark green blanket. The stillness of the morning and the spacious common room brought her a sense of calm after the rough night. Much like a boat finally sailing on a calm sea after an incredible storm, Ramona felt at ease.

Ramona hadn't spoken to Draco since the incident. It was safe to say she couldn't approach him with a chatty phrase and start a friendly discussion. They were both lost in a frenzy of passion and lust, the tension between them reaching a climax.

Many climaxes, so to speak.

She wasn't sure what that meant for their relationship at that point. The word "relationship" in itself was strange when she thought of the two of them. Once upon a time, he was her only friend. Now, whatever they were or whatever they were going to be was tainted by a filthy encounter.

It was undeniable that she had gotten jealous when she heard that he and Pansy had a sex thing. She knew that she was protective of him. She knew he was handsome. But she had never had that kind of encounter with anyone else before. Never before did she find herself so consumed by another person's presence.

Most of all, she hadn't imagined the events transpiring in such a way once they found themselves alone. How was this a good and healthy beginning to restoring an old friendship?

Ramona felt silly. And dumb. And most definitely angry at herself for letting herself go in such a manner- especially with him.

Every time she let the guilt consume her, fear came as its companion. Fear, anger, guilt, shame- she was feeling everything at once. Draco had once seen what her father had done to her. Draco had seen what kind of monster he was. Draco was the only person that did something. He was the first one who did anything. Draco was the first one that believed her.

The thoughts made her mind swirl so she quickly settled on the couch, wanting to enjoy the silence of the common room while she could. Finally, she could breathe. The silence caressed her skin like a feather, taking away her jagged edges.

At first.

Soon enough, it gnawed at her insides.  The silence was like a gaping void, needing to be filled with sounds, words, anything.  Silence seeped into her every pore, slowly paralyzing her, like a poison.

Thoughts were accelerating inside her head; a spinning wheel that couldn't stop spinning but span even faster until it wasn't a wheel but a black dot of nothingness that tried to suck her in.