sweet ~ corpse husband

guilt

corpses pov:

I don't know why I asked her to leave, if anything I wanted her to stay. I had a really good time last night and I hoped she knew that. It was just that the messages were too much. They didn't say anything bad about y/n, in fact they were still going on about the bachelor, it was just who they were coming from.

Julie.

I knew that y/n was becoming suspicious of me whenever Julie was brought up. I knew that my face would turn a bit paler and my voice would go a bit quieter. It was just too hard to hide the fact that we had history.

Not the kind of history that people would normally think when you say that though. Julie was in a loving relationship with George and I fucked that up and I felt horrible.

Whenever I heard y/n talk about Julie I was just reminded of everything that had happened between us and how much she hated me and it hurt. I felt guilty for what I had done. Neither Julie nor George deserved it. He was a really good mate to me and I felt like there was nothing I could do to make up for what I had done.

I assumed that Julie hadn't told y/n about our situation because she was embarrassed but I was happy to learn she and fixed things with George. They deserved to be happy. Maybe I didn't deserve to be happy. Maybe that's why I drove y/n away yesterday, because I was having the time of my life and I didn't deserve it. I didn't deserve her.

But this time away from her had been horrible. I never thought it would happen, but I missed her constant remarks and sarcastic humour, I missed how she would roll her eyes at everything and I missed her lips on mine. I wasn't in love with her, but I missed her so much. More than just a friend would. This was a weird, complicated and difficult relationship we had and my stupid actions had only stuffed it up more. I knew that I hurt y/n when I told her to leave but I had to fix this. I just had to.

I would do anything.

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Authors note:
sorry for the short chapter x