Suzue Reed

Chapter 57

"As i thought... i'm better off dead"
- Jasmine

Chapter 57: Memory

"Jazzy? are you okay?" my eyes landed at a boy with black messy hair and dark green eyes.

i nod and smiled at him. i could see girls glaring at me hatefully.

"Yeah Tristan you should go back to practice"

i walk pass him but i felt him held my arm to held me back.

i accidentally let out a hiss causing him to let go of me and widen his eyes.

he was about to say something when someone called him. we both turn around and when y eyes met a pair of chocolate brown eyes i unconsciously stiffen and let out a shaky breath.

my heart started racing and i felt my cheeks heated.

"bryan what is it?" i heard tristan ask and i could sense him feeling annoyed.

"Practice" bryan simply said and turned around with Lester behind him.

i felt my chest tighten when he just ignored me but i remained calm outside and turn around to leave.

ignoring tristan's annoyed calling.

Tristan is a childhood friend of mine.

We were close when we were kids but when we tarted junior high he suddenly confessed his feelings to me causing our relationship to feel ignore.

i started ignoring him since then. i know it was a dick move but i don't want to hurt him.

This is really cliche but all i could think was that. i didn't even give him a proper confession.

though he didn't ignore me or got mad at me. he started chasing after me instead insisting that one day i'll accept his feelings.

Bryan is different from tristan. he doesn't like me but he doesn't hate me either.

he's the kindest person i know. when i was trapped in the rain he gave me his umbrella and run in the rain.

he also gave me his food when amelia dumped it in the garbage bin.

i know it sound like he really cares for me but that isn't the case. he... he just pities me.

and i don't hate it because he doesn't hide it from me, he openly shows it but doesn't utter anything.

he's so kind that i started getting flustered around him.

i took a deep breath and smiled.

i wish i could let out this silly feelings i have for him.

.

.

.

i stop in front of my house and opened it and got greeted by silence and the smell of cigarettes, alcohol and after sex.

biting my lower lip i entered the house and saw pieces of cigarettes in the floor and bottles of alcohol.

"oh you're back?" i tiredly stared at my mother who's body is wrap with blanket and a cigarette in his mouth. she didn't glared at me nor shows any sign of resentment nor happiness.

it's as if i was just someone living in the house and would just go one day and come home the next day.

it's as if i am just a tenant in her house.

i hum and nod.

i started cleaning the room while she staggered on the kitchen to probably get another drink.