Glow

Paradise

'This is SO  wrong!' a rigidly standing Namjoon shouts. It seems like everyone was in a state of shock, silence ringing after his shout.

Hiding behind Jungkook I peek out around him at the faces of his band mates. Taehyung and Jimin are cuddled on a large chair made for two, white knuckled from grasping each other's hands. Hoseok is holding his hands over his ears, repeating a mantra of lalalala. Yoongi is just staring, jaw dropped, from the chair at the small dinette set near the kitchen. 

Seokjin, however, is active. Moving past me silently he goes to the bathroom we just left and enters. I suddenly hear the shower stop running and Seokjin cursing loudly.

'You left the water running too?!' Namjoon continues.

'A mess! The room is such a mess! Why didn't you at least clean it up before leaving??' Seokjin exclaims, coming back into the room. Jungkook is still holding my hand, so he pulls me to beside him nervously as we are both in the crosshairs of a wave of indignation and shock.

A lot of Hangul is suddenly flying through the air. I get a few words in English, but it doesn't help me get the gist of what they are saying... though it's obvious the topic. So I just stand there, bewildered, clutching the towel to my chest with one hand and forearm.

As the argument gets more heated Jungkook physically reacts, stomping, waving his free hand, and pulling our hands closer to him, which pulls me a bit off balance.

I struggle to keep upright, the towel around me, and to not cry as the emotional tide keeps rising. Finally I find my breaking point and pull my hand out of Jungkook's grasp, shaking my pinched fingers, crying. 

Their glows go away... except for Jungkooks. This puzzles me, but I ignore it for more immediate concerns. Facing Namjoon I scowl even while my tears flow freely.

'What do you think I should've done? Hmm? Just let him be in pain? Ignored him completely? Or is this because you don't trust me? Am I big and scary? Do I hold you hostage because I can't change my schedule to fit your needs?' Shock suddenly colors his face. Hoseok has looked up, one ear uncovered as I start talking back to Namjoon. He looks a bit puzzled, but I am sure he'll get the details later. Yoongi is looking paler the more I talk, while the rest are just nodding in agreement with me. I don't know how much they understand, but it's weirdly nice to think I might have someone on my side of the conversation with me.

'At no point did I try to seduce him. I didn't even remove any clothing until he suggested I use a towel instead of the clothes that got wet while I was trying to blindly touch his shoulder to alleviate the symptoms.' I glare at Namjoon, pissed. 'I have no fucking clue what you have been saying, but to make assumptions, to make me and Jungkook defend ourselves to you is not the actions I would expect of the leader of BTS. Nothing that happened will ever leave these walls, be spoken about in the hearing range of anyone not directly associated with whatever this is... and I am fucking DONE standing here.' I stomp to the pile I had pulled out to take a shower after Jungkook was done. Grabbing it I go down the hall to another bathroom, this one a jack & jill between two of the rooms. I lock both doors leading in and start the shower, hoping there's hot water in this one. I don't even care to listen to see what's happening outside of this bathroom, I just stare into the mirror above the double sinks and decompress before stepping into the almost scalding water to properly clean up for the first time in days.

****

Coming back down the hall I hold back the scowl that wants to imprint itself on my face. I can only hope an actual conversation was had after I left, but I know how long it can take for heated emotions to level out, for ears to open and minds to consider.