𝐦𝐢𝐝𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐥𝐮𝐬𝐭 || 𝐝.𝐦. (18 +)

X

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꧁Dianna꧂
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~The Yule Ball~

As I walked back down to the Great Halls I found every girl surrounded by each other as they all described the dress they were going to wear at the Yule Ball.

All the chit-chat made my head want to explode at the sight of everyone rushing around like their head was cut off.

Then it hit me, I didn't have anything to wear, it was tomorrow. I rushed to Andrea and Fallon as they stared at me with confusion.

"Where's Malfoy." Andrea walks next to me while hugging her books tight.

"I don't know." I coughed out.

"We both know you're lying, Dianna," Fallon added while taking a bite of an apple.

"Draco's out of reach. I'm done with him." I took a deep breath, turning around seeing Draco enter the Great Hall.

Draco looked lost. Not the literal type of lost but, he didn't know what to do type lost.

All I wanted to do at that moment was hug him and tell him everything that I just said earlier, I didn't mean.

If hundreds of millions of thousands of men were put in front of me... I would still pick Draco.

And that's the problem. I continue to pick him when he clearly doesn't give a shit about me or anyone in that matter.

He deserved what he got from me. But I also know that he deserves way better than me...

He needed someone to be there and fight for him like Pansy did or still is doing. And I don't think I'm capable enough to keep going through the fucking emotional abuse that being with him has caused me.

Every time I look at him I feel like I'm suffocating. I can't move. I can't breathe. I can't talk. My heart stops.

But at the same time, he puts me at balance.

The moment I can't breathe, the oxygen fills my lungs.

The moment my heart stops and butterflies flutter around inside my stomach.

The moment I can't move because I get distracted by his every move.

The moment I'm suffocating because he's near me taking my breath away.

I was the diamond and he was rough.

The need for his touch and scent devoured my thoughts every second of every day and it felt like I was being eaten alive.

I knew I wanted him. But I knew he didn't want me.

I knew he wasn't good for me. But I knew I was good for him.

I wanted him to care. But I know he doesn't.

It's also a hard thing thinking you are only being used for sex because honestly, the feeling sucks. He said I was only a distraction, and honestly, that's all it felt like. I was a distraction.

The moment our eyes locked up. I suddenly found myself avoiding his gaze.

I look back at Andrea and Fallon, them looking confused again.

I could tell they wanted to say something but I interpreted to know what was about to come out of their mouths.

"-Cedric is a great guy and it's not fair that I have to make him wait for someone that I know will just fuck me over. Might as well stop the Draco versus Cedric thing because I'm tired." I hoarsely whispered, then quickly approached Cedric's table avoiding Draco.