Indecisive (Loki Laufeyson x Bucky Barnes x Reader)

CHAPTER 2

Y/N's POV

I was awakened by the deafening sound of traffic outside my house. That's when I heard the lock click and the front door slowly creak open.

"Honey I'm home!"

The familiar sound of my mothers voice called to me from the front door. I sat up, carefully rose to my feet, and shuffled to the kitchen.

As soon as I approached her, she pulled me into a warm embrace. The familiar comforting scent of her perfume overtook my senses.

For a moment, I felt at ease.

Only for a moment.

"Where's the car honey? I didn't see it out in the driveway."

A jolt of panic courses through me, and my whole body tenses up in her arms.

"So, about that," I pull away and look her in the eyes, "I kind of got into an accident."

"An accident?"

She grabs me by my shoulders, looking incredibly worried.

"What happened, are you okay?"

"I'm fine, just little freaked out." I didn't want to explain to her my medical dilemma.

"Honey who parked that god awful Prius outside of our house?"

"That's actually uh..... that's the rental."

"Oh, you couldn't get anything else?"

"No mom. That's all they had, and it's fine for right now. I'll use the insurance money and look for a new car on Monday." 

After that, she dropped the subject and I sat down by the counter to open my mail from the night before.

The first two were just junk mail, but the third one appeared to be a wax sealed letter. It was stamped with a wax 'A'.

"Mom, I think this letters for you, it has an 'A' on it that's for Anastasia right?"

She took the letter from me and inspected the seal. Her eyes grew wide with shock.

"No sweetheart," she said in a voice barely above a whisper. "that's not 'A' for Anastasia, that's 'A' for Augustus."

I raised my eyebrow.

"Who's that?"

"He's....your Father."

"My what?"

"He's your dad, Y/N"

I leaned over her shoulder to watch her open the letter. She peeled back the seal and took out a yellowed piece of paper. Neatly scrawled handwriting spelled out a message on the paper. It read:

My dearest Y/N,

I recently received word of your latest medical situation. I would like to meet with you for tea, as I believe that I may be able to answer the questions you have myself. Although I would recommend you have a conversation with your mother first regarding your heritage. I hope that you and your mother are in good health and that you will take my suggestion into consideration. Please don't hesitate to call me I will be available at 11:15 on Sunday, The Lotus Leaf is my usual spot. 

Sincerest regards,

Augustus Gray

He attached what I could only assume was his number to the bottom of the letter.

"Mom, care to explain what this means?"

She takes a deep breath, before starting.

"Well, there really is no easy way to say this, I might as well start from the beginning. You see, sweetheart, I'm not from around these parts." 

"Yes, mom I know, you're from Connecticut."

"No Y/N, I don't mean another state. What I mean, is that I'm not from this world. There are actually nine realms in this universe. This realm, that we are in right now, is Midgard, the realm of the humans. Your father is from Midgard, however I am not. I am originally from Asgard, the realm of the gods. 

"So you're like, a god?" 

"No, not exactly. The people of Asgard have their gods walk among them, however we are not gods ourselves."

"So I'm just half Asgardian and half Midgardian, right?"

"Yes, you were born in Asgard, but we came to Midgard on your second birthday." 

"How does that work? My dad was Midgardian, and you were Asgardian, but I was born in Asgard? I'm confused."

"Your dad and I met when I was sent down to earth on an assignment from the Queen. I met your father, Augustus, and we started a relationship. That relationship.....progressed romantically. I didn't know that I was pregnant with you until I returned to Asgard. I left your father a note promising that I would return, and that he could choose to either wait for me or move on with someone new. When you turned two years of age, I brought you back to Midgard in the hopes that we could be a family again." 

"So what happened? That clearly didn't work out, and I have no memory of him."

"By the time I came back to Midgard, your father had already moved on with another woman.  As you can tell he clearly read the letter, and made his decision. When I lived in Asgard, I was a handmaiden to Odin's wife, Frigga, and we were very close. When I came to earth, Frigga had Heimdall promise to watch over you. If you ever were to return to Asgard, Frigga assured me that you would be welcomed with open arms." 

"Is there anything else you want to tell me?"

It came off harsh, but I wanted to know everything she hadn't told me.

"There's one last thing that I think you should know. Being half Asgardian gives you some abilities that most 'normal' people don't have. You were born with the ability to regenerate and at the same time your physical abilities are....enhanced, so to speak."

"How long were you going to keep this a secret from me?"

"I wanted to wait until you were ready to learn about all of this. I was also waiting for the possible chance that your father would reach out to you and we could be a family again. Y/N, I know this is a lot to take in, I just hope you're not mad at me for keeping this from you. I didn't want to keep it a secret, but I didn't want to overwhelm you, especially at a younger age.

"How could you do something like this? How could you live with yourself knowing that everything you've ever told me, everything I thought I knew about who I am.....was a lie?"

"It pained me to keep it from you, and I know it wasn't one of my proudest moments not telling you. At the time it seemed like the right thing to do."

I sat down with my hands on my knees.

I didn't know how to react, so I decided to head over to the library to clear my head.

I turned on the ignition, slammed on the gas and didn't stop until I reached the library.

I slammed the door getting out of the car and practically sprinted up the steps, flung open the wooden doors and made a beeline for the fiction section. Tears welled up in my eyes, but I held them back as long as I could. Once I reached the mythology section, I sank to my knees and the tears spilled over onto my cheeks. 

I wasn't upset about my heritage, just at how fast this was all being thrown at me. It was so much to take in. But, I might as well do some research of my own.

I wiped my tears with the sleeve of my sweater, before standing up and began examining the rows of each bookcase for Norse mythology. Unfortunately, I could only find one that mentioned Asgard by name.

Within its ancient pages were tales of the gods, specifically the Allfather Odin, his wife Frigga, and their two sons, Thor and Loki.

I learned of the Lady Sif and the warriors three, I learned about the feared creatures of the nine realms, but I couldn't find anything about interactions between Asgardians and Midgardians. I was practically back at square one. 

After searching for what seemed like hours, and finishing the only book cover to cover multiple times, I drifted off into what felt like the deepest sleep of my life.