I Ain't Playing [[PJM]] ✔️

The Only One

A/N: I was listening to these songs whilst writing this, so if you can, give it a listen.

Break-in - Halestorm ft Amy Lee

Speak to me - Amy Lee

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Jimin

The way Hana sobbed as she held our son made my heartbreak. It sounded painful as she wept and I wished I could take the pain away. I deserved the pain she was feeling and I would happily take it from her. I had to hold back my tears as she struggled to tell Jihun that she loved him.

Love never was like the movies.

It was full of pain, tears and a broken heart.

I knew I kept telling myself that I never knew what love was until I fell in love with Hana. But it was true. She made me realise that I wasted my time with her sister. I was also so blinded that I didn't know of her trauma and I made it worse by telling her she would never compare with Eujin. I made her suffer even more and I ruined her confidence so many times. 

"Th...you," Hana said and I looked up to see her looking at me, "You...ok."

"Don't worry about me," I said, quickly wiping my tears away, "Let me worry about you, ok?"

Hana nodded and kissed Jihun's head, "Looks...you. Baby...you,"

I stood up and hesitated as I reached her bed. I wasn't sure if she wanted me anywhere near her but when she held her hand out to me, I felt my bottom lip tremble and warm tears dripped down my cheeks. I sat down and she squeezed my hand.

"He...you... look."

"Looks like me?" I asked and she nodded, "Yeah. The boys keep telling me that but he has your eyes."

"I...sorry." She said and I frowned, "Not...be..."

"No, don't get frustrated," I said quickly, "Baby, it's ok. Take your time. I'm not going anywhere. I will never leave you again."

"Belie...you...I...never...believed...you."

"It was my fault," I sniffed, "But I don't want to think about that. I'm here now and I will feel guilty for the rest of my life. I should have never broken your trust and never ever-"

"Love...you..." She clenched her jaw "Still...love."

"I don't deserve your love," I whispered.

"Stupid...you."

I laughed, "Yeah. I know,"

Hana smiled slightly and moved Jihun towards me. I took our sleeping little man and placed him in his pram.

"Don't...cry," Hana said as I looked at her, "I'm...f-fine."

"This isn't fine but...but you are alive and that is what matters," I said kissing her hand, "I have something to talk to you about but let me finish before you react or answer. Please."

Hana gave me a thumbs up.

I let out a shaky breath and nodded, "No matter how far away we both feel from each other, my love for you will never change. I've been a terrible husband and I won't forgive myself for that but I admit that I should have done things differently," 

Hana nodded and patted my hand.

"But I will always wait for you. If you want to start over then I will be there but if you want to end this, I understand. I'll always be there for you and Jihun. I will do everything for both of you and will never let you down again," I said, lifting her hand to my forehead and I closed my eyes, "You are my world. You are everything and you are the only one who knows me completely. You've seen me at my worst and never turned your back on me. You have built me up from the ground and made me feel human again."

I gulped.

"I will love you to the end of time for what you have done for me. I know I have done a lot for you and I'm glad that I was the one to show you what true love is but I ruined it. You are in this bed because of me," I shook my head, "I know I'm feeling sorry for myself but what can you do? Guilt doesn't just disappear overnight."

"Jimin,"

"I will sign the divorce papers for you. I know you couldn't take my treatment of you and I don't blame you. In fact, if I was you I would have filed for divorce much sooner. You are perfect Hana. You are just...everything," I said and I looked at her, "You don't need to cry over me anymore. You will find someone who is worthy of your love and-"

"No!" Hana said loudly and yanked her hand back, "No!"

"Hana, please, I-"

"No!" She said and smacked my arm, "I...you...no!"

"Baby, you need to calm down, please!" I said holding her hands as she went to grab her hair, "I haven't finished. I didn't sign the papers yet and-"

"Don't...leave."

"I have to finish what I was going to say," I said, "Will you let me finish?"

Hana nodded and her bottom lip trembled as she cried. I reached forward and wiped a few tears away with my thumb, smiling as she leaned into my hand.

"I want you to marry me," I said and she frowned, "I know we had a wedding already but it wasn't the wedding you dreamed of. It was a wedding that was meant for your sister. I want you to go dress shopping. I want you to go venue hunting and I want this day to be perfect for you. Hana, I've told you that I would give anything to you and I want to give you a wedding that you deserve. But...only if you want it. I would understand if you don't, but I will give you some time. I don't want to rush you into anything while you are still recovering."

"Would...do...th-that?"

"Of course," I said, "You should have been given the world from day one but I manage to tug the rug from under your feet. Will you think about it?"

Hana nodded and a doctor walked into the room.

"Sorry to disturb you, but I need to take Hana down for a CAT scan," He said, "You can wait here until I bring her back. It shouldn't take too long."

"Do you want me here for when you get back?"

Hana nodded. A few nurses came in and helped Hana into a wheelchair and before she could be wheeled out, she grabbed the bottom of my shirt.

"Answer...get..." She clenched her fists and looked like she wanted to punch herself, "Back. Answer...when...back,"

"I'll wait for you to get back then," I said kissing her forehead, "I'll wait. I...Hana, I love you."

Hana's cheeks went pink and she looked away, "Love...too."

A/N: Soooooo. Sorry for the slow updates. I have to be in a certain mood to write this as you all know.

I'm also thinking of ending it soon so sorry about that haha.

Don't forget to vote and comment throughout.

Stay weird <33