I Ain't Playing [[PJM]] ✔️

I Love You So Much It Hurts

Jimin

Hana had been home a week now and I had gone to spend all my free time with her. It was awkward but she never stopped me from seeing Jihun. Seeing Hana as a mother made my heart swell and she was perfect for that role. She had always been so loving and taking care of everyone. Especially me.

There were many occasions when I had come home after a bad day and she'd tell me to put my feet up while she cooked me something to eat. Then she ran me a bath and dragged me to the bathroom. She'd always sit on the floor while I bathed telling me about her day and by the time I finished, the water was cold. She'd then get into bed with me and run her fingers through my hair until I fell asleep.

And now my bed was cold and barely slept in.

I hated being there because it wasn't home anymore. Not without her. I needed her back but I fucked up big time. I was just too scared to tell her why. I knew Hana and she thought it was because I was still in love with Eujin. I despised her but I could never find the right time to tell her what happened.

It was my fault we were in this situation. If I had chased after her then we wouldn't be in this mess. I would have been there for her when she first went into labour and there when she first went to the hospital. But I wasn't.

I wiped my sweaty palms on my jeans and rang her doorbell and cursed. I might have woken the baby up. A few minutes later the door opened and Hana looked at the flowers in my hands.

"I got you these," I said pushing them into her chest.

"Oh," She said taking them from me, "Thank you. Jihun is sleeping but come in. I'll make you a drink,"

I moved forward to kiss her and she took a large step away from me. I gulped back my hurt and followed her into her place. It was always so clean and tidy. The smell always made my stomach turn with regret because it was her smell. It wasn't flowery or too sweet, it was just perfect. I spotted the cupcakes on the counter and my stomach rumbled.

She giggled slightly, "Hungry?"

"Starved," I said sitting down, "You don't have to make me a drink. You need to sit down and-"

"Jimin, you are a guest," She said, "I can't let you go thirsty, or hungry,"

I rubbed my chest, "Hana, when can we talk about this between us?"

"I don't know what you are talking about," Hana said, turning her back on me, "What would you like to eat? I can make you something after I sort the flowers out,"

"Anything you want to cook," I spoke softly and I couldn't help but admire her body. It was hard to believe that she had given birth to our son a week ago. Her waist was still small and her ass looked great in the leggings she had on. The swell of her breasts made my mouth water and the small bulge on her tummy made me want to hug her.

Hana was truly beautiful and she didn't need to try. She was beautiful the way she was. Even with the dark bags under her eyes and messy bun on the top of her head.

"Hana," I whispered, "We need to talk,"

She sighed and turned to face me, trying not to cry, "The divorce papers are with my lawyer. I just need to sign them and give them to you,"

"I don't want to get divorced," I said standing up and moving to her side, "I want you and I never want to let you go,"

Hana shook her head, "Jimin, I've read the papers. My lovely sister is going on about how you are back together and couldn't be happier,"

"It's not true!" I exclaimed and she smacked my chest.

"Don't you dare raise your voice at me, Jimin," She hissed, "I am not letting you wake up Jihun after I have just spent an hour trying to get him to sleep. If you want to argue with me, then you can just leave right now. I am not in the mood,"

"I'm sorry," I said, "I just...Hana, I love you so much it hurts. I can't let you walk away from me. Not after everything that we have been through,"

"Then you should have thought about that before you let me walk away the first time," Hana said, sadness in her voice, "If you had run after me, then you could have explained everything. But you didn't,"

"I know, baby," I said, putting my hands on her face, "But I was scared,"

"Don't call me baby," Hana choked out, and tears streamed down her face, "I was your baby but not anymore. Eujin is back in your life so you can just get back to her,"

"For fuck sake," I sighed, "What can I do to get you to listen?"

Hana shook her head, "I don't know but right now, I just want to sit down and eat. I've not eaten properly since I've got home and I'm tired,"

"Go lay down," I said, and she lifted her eyebrows at me, "Woman, go and lay down. Get some rest. I'm here so if Jihun wakes up I will look after him,"

"I don't know,"

"You don't think I can look after him? I'm not a bad parent,"

"That's not it," Hana glared at me, "When have I ever said you are a bad parent? You are a brilliant one so where the hell did you get that idea?"

"That came out worse than I had intended," I sighed and put my hands on my face, "Please, go and take a nap. You've...you know..."

Hana smiled slightly, "Expressed my milk?"

"Yeah, that," I said with a burning face, "I'll feed him if he wakes up and I'll be a dad. But you are not to leave your bed unless I come to you. Got it?"

Hana sighed and bit into her lip, but nodded, "Ok. I could do with some sleep,"

"Good girl," I smiled, "Go get some rest. I'll be right here if you need anything. I promise you that-"

"Jimin, you don't need to promise me anything," She said, "Jihun is in good hands,"

I couldn't help myself and I planted my lips on hers, kissing her quickly. She didn't have time to pull away because I did first.

"I got my kiss," I said, winking at her. Her cheeks went red and she smacked my chest walking away mumbling under her breath.

Again, I found my eyes watching her. She kissed Jihun gently on the forehead and gave me one last look before she headed down the hall, and into her bedroom. I grabbed a cupcake and a glass of fizzy drink and sat next to Jihun's moses basket.

"It's just you and me my beautiful boy," I said, as his lips pursed slightly, "I'll look after you baby,"

A/N: Don't ask for updates, don't ask when I am going to update. I will update when I update (:

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