I Ain't Playing [[PJM]] ✔️

Call Me Crazy

Hana

It had been a good few months since I had been home and I was slowly recovering. My speech had improved but I still forgot how to speak sometimes. Words just slipped my mind and I ended up getting so frustrated I almost tore my hair out.

Walking was still an issue and I was still going to physical therapy to learn how to walk without crutches. Most of the time I was stuck in the wheelchair because my legs always gave up on me but the doctor said he had high hopes for me. I can't remember what he said about my brain injury or what part was damaged, but he said it could take time to be steady on my feet again.

Jimin changed one of the downstairs rooms into our bedroom so I didn't have to climb the stairs when I was tired. The boys stayed in the rooms upstairs and always helped me when they could. I was so grateful they were around.

When they had to work, the girls came round to keep me company if they weren't at work and it was the same as my other friends. Minhyuk and Wonho were always there to help around the house and with Jihun when I needed it. Jihun was almost 1 and as much as I loved him, he was an absolute terror.

He was walking, he was chewing everything and I found it difficult to chase after him. Thankfully, he loved his uncles and tired them out. I loved that little boy so much and he was the main reason to make me get up in the morning. 

When I first came home I never left the bedroom unless I needed the bathroom. I didn't want to shower, I didn't want to eat and I didn't want to spend time with anyone. I had slipped into an unwanted depression and took me a few months to get some help. My tablets were helping and Jimin managed to get me the best psychiatrist around.

I had so much to talk about and even though it took me ages to talk about it, it was making me feel better. She was a nice person and she never got annoyed when I couldn't find my words or my sentences. She was patient and that was what I needed. At one session, she made Jimin come to listen to what I was put through and she mentioned what he had done to me as well. He cried, I cried and he started to sit in with me as I spoke.

I smiled down at Jihun who had fallen asleep on Hoseok who was asleep on the floor next to him. Jungkook was asleep on Jin's shoulders and the other boys were spread out the living room. Yoongi was snoring next to me and I had to stop myself from laughing. Jihun was a live-wire and even their energy couldn't keep them awake. It was like his batteries were always charged but he was great when he went to bed. He went to bed and he stayed in bed.

My phone started to buzz on the table that was over my legs and I picked it up so as not to wake up the boys. I pushed the table forward and bit into my lip as I grabbed my crutches. I heaved myself up and wobbled as I slowly made my way to the kitchen for something to eat. It took me a good 5 minutes to get there and I wanted to yell out in frustration.

I had no idea how bad a head injury could be and I was suffering. I mean, I was lucky I woke up after what happened. It took me at least a month to remember what happened and I broke down all over again. My sister tried to kill me and almost succeeded. She was arrested and before they even had the chance to take her to court, she took her own life.

I didn't get the chance to talk to her or even say goodbye. Call me crazy but I wanted to forgive her. It was clear that she wasn't mentally stable but forgiving her would have given me peace of mind. My parents still blamed me for her death and told me they wished it was me in the coffin instead of her but it was something I was used to. Mum always told me she wished I was never born because I was such a disappointment.

Rolling my eyes, I reached over from the chair I was sitting on and opened the fridge. I hummed a tune to myself and grabbed a sandwich that Jimin had made me. He was talking with his lawyer about something and told me to eat. I sat in silence eating my sandwich and caught my reflection on my phone.

I picked it up and turned the camera on to face me. My shoulders dropped as I saw how short my hair was. After the accident, they had to cut my hair to get to the wound on the back of my head and my hair was shorter than I had ever had. I hated it but loved it at the same time. Sure it didn't look too bad but I couldn't do anything with it. The top was longer than the back because my hair took longer to grow over the scars and the doctors had to keep cutting my hair to keep an eye on the healing wounds.

I wasn't sure how to do my hair for my wedding and I couldn't find something I liked that would go with my dress. I was getting more and more frustrated each day because nothing was keeping me happy.

For once, I avoided reading articles online and stopped opening mail from fans or haters. I received more fan mail than hate for once but it still scared me too much to open it. Jimin had done well to protect me from the press and I hadn't left the house since I came home. It was starting to bore me being home all the time.

I had just finished my sandwich when the door opened and Jimin walked in holding a carrier bag over his shoulder. He was singing quietly to himself and he looked up. He smiled widely at me and wandered over to me. He kissed my cheek and put the bag in front of me.

"What is it?" I asked, "A wig?"

"No, and you aren't getting a wig. You look good with short hair," He said, "I thought you might need cheering up."

"Thank you," I said opening the bag and I giggled, "Really?"

"Yup!" He grinned, "I thought you could bling out your crutches and it might make the press smile when I take you out for dinner tonight."

"What?" I said, "Y-you want to...dinner?"

Jimin put his hands in mine and nodded, "I told you I would treat you like a queen and that is what I am going to do. Your therapist said you deserve it and you're ready to leave the safety net. If you don't want to, I understand."

I looked down at the cute decorations Jimin had got me and my mind went blank and I was unable to string a sentence together. It happened when I panicked and Jimin stood up, hugging me quickly.

"I will order out in-"

"No!" I said quickly and shook my head, "I...go. I'll go."

A/N: Magical time hop~

I will be bringing this to an end soon so do your thing - vote and comment throughout.

This was what I imagined her hair to look like as well.

Stay weird <33