Past Her Insanity - Taylorde (complete)

• Ch.Thirteen - Sharks •

"These fucking heels, man. I'm going to beat the shit out of whoever suggested I wear-"

"Megan!"

"What?"

"We're live!"

"...Hello, I'm Meghan Trainor, coming to you live from Los Angeles at the VMAs 2017! Josh, what's the BEV report?"

"Well Meghan, it's absolutely crowded down there. Thousands of celebrities are here and ready to start walking the red and good Lord, what an evening to be out. It is hot!"

"Let's just hope I don't pass out in these shoes, Josh"

"Let's just hope I don't pass out! I'm the one in the helicopter!"

I giggle nervously as I eavesdrop on the conversation. My arm is linked tightly around Ella's. I feel like a goldfish in a shark tank: out of place and terrified. And everyone is out to get me. Despite the stabbing pain of my anxiety, I manage to smile sweetly and keep a calm head. But maybe that's just the new medication I'm on.
Ella's talking away to some people I have already forgotten the names of. I try to see if I can remember anybody in the frenzy of faces.

Harry is here with the rest of his ragtag band members. I try not to gag and surf my eyes elsewhere. I'm pretty sure the Victoria's Secret Angels are here, for whatever reason. A group of tall, winged, long haired girls totter around the place, showing a lot of skin. I hope they don't get sun burned.

One of them seems to recognise me. She's shorter than the others. Her thick eyebrows furrow as she tries to analyse me. I decide to turn away. I don't think I want to actually talk to anyone at this thing.

"And she made it all by herself, didn't you Tay?"

"What?", I ask.

Ella's friends giggle and I blush at myself for not listening.

"Your dress", Ella smiles.

"I love it", a short haired girl comments, "Its the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. I'd probably trip in it though, you know me!"

The girls around her laugh in response. Her bright red lips spread into a Hollywood smile, deep creases cutting into the sides of her mouth. I'll admit, she's very pretty. My heart flutters a little as she adjusts her dress around her cleavage. Ella seems to notice my wandering eyes and squeezes a little harder at my arm.

"Jenn is such a klutz, right?", a brunette asks me, teasingly. Jenn playfully taps the girls shoulder with that back of her hand and looks my way. I nod dumbly and her big blue eyes awkwardly gaze over her shoulder to see if there's anything distracting that she can escape to.

I honestly don't know what happened to my social skills. Everyone around me seems to be effortless in their comfortable conversations. No small talk, no embarrassing pauses. I had always been good at talking with Ellie. No personal things, but things. It's going to be a very long night. For God's sake, the night hasn't even started!

I lean into Ella's arm and she finally begins to look uncomfortable. "Taylor, you don't have to hold onto me that tightly. I'm not letting go, I promise", she says, giving me a slightly concerned gaze.

Nosy Meghan Whatever-Her-Name-Is and her cameraman are buzzing around, asking everyone questions about the evening and how they're feeling. It seems so strange to be a part of all this again. I feel so inexperienced. And yet I'm more experienced than Ella is. Will it take years for me to build up my camera courage again? I surely hope not.

I watch as Eyebrows Girl, who was eyeing me up a few minutes ago, gets her round of the same old questions.

"Cara! You look... great", Meghan says, holding back a smirk.