Love Mattheo, your greatest love.

Crucio

"Y/n come on we have to go." Draco says interrupting my thinking. I stay staring at the wall not moving a muscle. I'm just so tired. I don't want to move. I don't want to eat. I don't want to talk, or even go to the meeting today.

I feel the bed shift and Draco comes into my line of view. He lays in front of me, staring into my eyes. Searching for any sign that I'm okay.

"We have to go." He whispers. I take in his beauty, watching the way his brows furrow when looking into my eyes, searching for anything. Anything to reassure him. The way his lips curve into a frown when he doesn't find anything. Or the way his hair falls into his eyes. The way his cheeks flush when I brush the hair out of his face.

I've ruined everything. Everything I had I've ruined. I could have had something with Mattheo but I let my thoughts ruin that. I could have even started something with Draco. I'm an inconvenience to everyone. Lorenzo especially. Maybe I should just kill myself, ease the pain and suffering from the thoughts. From the awful and sorrowful thoughts.

I'm not enough. I'm not worthy of the friendships I have.

"Draco-" I say my voice wavering. I need to feel something. I need something or someone. "Kiss me." I whisper.

He shakes his head. "That's not a good ide-" "please I need- I need to feel something. I need to feel you."

He looks at me with pity. Feeling sorry for me. Everyone does and I hate it. I hate it. I hate me. I hate everything. "Don't look at me like that Draco."

"Like what?"

"Like you feel sorry for me. Don't."

"I don't want to use you y/n you don't deserve that. You're not in the state of mind right now."

"Please Draco, please." Tears threaten to fall, burning my eyes.

He leans in, placing his soft lips on mine. Gently kissing me.

His hand moves to the back of my head, pulling at my thick hair.

I moan softly into his mouth, savoring the sweet taste. Taking in his comforting scent.

I move my hand to his back, feeling his muscles through his black suit.

Our kisses get faster and messy. I pull at the bottom of his shirt, ripping it off. His lips move down my neck and to my chest, sucking and licking.

Draco pulls my shirt off when both of our dark marks start to burn and glow. We both scream out in pain and clutch our arm. Hoping that the pain will stop. I try to put my shirt on to the best of my ability. I help Draco with his too and we apparate to Malfoy Manner.

We start to walk down the dark hallway that smells of blood and death. And I almost gag from all of the dark magic lingering around.

I look over to Draco who looks as if he is going to faint. He looks over to me and grabs my hand. Rubbing circles with his thumb on the top of my hand. We stop before the tall black doors, taking a second to ready our selfs for what's to come. I turn to Draco, looking at the sickly boy beside me.

"Draco?"

"Hmm"

"I am sorry I've been such a bad friend. I haven't even asked how your task was going. I was being so selfish only thinking about how I was feeling I didn't even stop to think about you. I'm sorry."

He turns to look at me. "Don't. Don't be sorry. It's fine I'm doing fine. I don't want you to worry we will figure this out. All of it."

"I don't want you to get t-tortured." I whisper.