ℝ𝔸ℕ𝔻𝕐 & 𝕁𝔸ℂ𝕂𝕃𝕐ℕ 𝕆ℕ𝔼𝕊ℍ𝕆𝕋𝕊🏳️🌈

Claustrophobia (Randy)

ANDY'S POV
I've never liked parties, but I go there because my best friend goes there. I always feel like some kind of dog following their owner, but the truth is that he has always been all I have. Him and my mom, but my mom is not always with me. She works a lot but still manages to be always present, the school forces me to stay away from her and I'm not exactly happy with this, but it's also true that I've always enjoyed studying, so things balance out. To help my mum, I work in a coffee shop near the school, so I can go there right after school, eat on the way and save time that I can then use for homework. The pay is not that great, but I do it mainly to help my mom. I would do anything for her.

"Are you coming to the party tonight?" we look into each other's eyes, a second for him and a time that seems infinite to me. Blue meets brown. I’ve always hated the color brown, for me it was as if it didn't make sense, I didn't know what to use it for when I was coloring, but I quickly changed my mind when I met him. We were both 6 years old; magically brown has become my favorite color. The color of his eyes is not brown, it’s a slightly light shade of this color, in the summer it becomes almost gray, I don't know how this is possible but it is. "Andy?" and as always I am completely lost in the vastness of his eyes, it happens so often that now it's strange if it doesn't happen.

He smiles and I try to focus my attention on something other than him, but his smile makes it all the more difficult.

"No" his smile disappears, managing to make me feel guilty. Our empathy is something I'm not sure other people have. The way I feel is able to influence 100% how he feels and vice versa. "You know I don't like parties..."

"But I'll be there with you" he makes me big eyes as a child accompanied with the pout and he knows that I can not say no when he does so.

"Fine"

"Fine? You said fine?"

“Yeah, I said it's fine” he happily jumps around the room before hugging me tightly. Little priceless moments that make me feel the most special person in the world.

You have no idea what it means to be important to someone when a hundred people make you feel like you don't even exist.

***

"You should wear this shirt" I look at his shirt in his hands, I love it but it's too tight for me, or at least that’s how I see it on me.

"There is no way that I can get into a tight white shirt like this" all my shapes would be noticed and it is certainly not something I want.

"Andy" we have this thing that is as if it allows us to understand what we think and in some cases it’s the last thing I want because he is able to read thoughts that should remain private. "You are beautiful, babe" for him it’s completely normal to call me "babe", it’s a sort of nickname he gives me but the meaning I attribute to it is completely different from what he attributes to it. And it's great to be able to hear his voice calling me that way, but at the same time it hurts to know that it not only has a different meaning for him but also because one day he'll call someone else "babe", use the same nickname for another person, a girl.

Before I realize it, I feel his arms welcome me in an embrace full of love and, at this point, holding back the tears is impossible.
Crying sucks but crying in his arms is totally different.

"You are beautiful, you know that?" he leaves me a sweet kiss on the forehead, lingering for a few more seconds as he always does. I don't know why he does it but it’s one of the many other things I love that he does, it allows me to better impress on my skin the sensation of his lips in contact with my skin. "You know what?" I look into his eyes urging him to continue "You can put on my hoodie, the light yellow one with the black rose at the top on the right side and I put the pink one with the black rose in the same place" two hoodies we bought together two years ago, mine is the pink one but he always wears it and his is the yellow one but I always wear it.