To Love a Hunter (Reader x Caveira)

Incorrect Quotes

A/N:  Trying something new for this update.  Let me know what you think of it!

Y/N:  You know you've made it when you see your face everywhere you go

Caveira: ...

Caveira:  Y/N those are 'wanted' posters

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Y/N:  How's the most beautiful person in the world doing?

Caveira: *blushes*  fine i guess-

Tachanka:  I'm doing great, thanks

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Caveira:  Where is my fucking knife!?

Y/N:  Cav, can you say it nicer please?

Caveira:  Fine

Caveira:  May I adress the whereabouts of my fucking knife?

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Buck:  Has anyone seen my hat?

Caveira:  Y/N probably took it.  He steals everything.

Y/N:  What!?  That is not true-

Caveira:  Like my heart.

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Caveira:  You know Y/N, Thermite gives Ash flowers every week.  I wish you would do that.

Y/N:  Ummm, okay?

(Two days later)

Y/N:  *Gives Ash flowers*

Ash:  What the-

Y/N:  I don't get it either

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Y/N:  I need to be ten times more intimidating than I am right now

Caveira:  *looks up from book*  You know ten times zero is still zero right?

Y/N: ....

Y/N:  Okay you smart ass mother fu-

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Caveira:  Recruits, there are three ways to complete missions:  The right way, the wrong way, and the Caveira way

Y/N:  Isn't that the wrong way?

Caveira:  Yeah but it's faster

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Y/N:  I'm a simple man

Caveira:  Yesterday you literally told me you wanted a jet engine-powered car with laser-guided hellstorm missiles

Y/N:  I'm a simple man with a complicated mindset

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Y/N:  *drinking diet coke*  Y'know, I'm glad Diet Coke cans are silver.  No blaring, in-your-face, bright-ass red all over the damn thing.  Just a nice, simple silver.

Caveira:  ...

Caveira:  Are you a fucking bull?

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Y/N: *finishes off last terrorist*  Finally, we won!

Random terrorist:  *Appears behind Y/N*

Caveira:  Uh, Y/N...look behind-

Y/N:  NOPE!  Nope I'm not looking back, we won!

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Y/N:  Did you know the pupil can expand up to 50% when you're looking at something beautiful?

Caveira: *looking at Y/N*  I think my pupils are broken

Y/N:  How so?

Caveira:  They wont stop expanding

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Caveira:  Y/N, you can't just eat chocolate for lunch everyday

Y/N:  Cav, chocolate is made from cocoa, which is taken from a tree, making it a plant.  Therefore, chocolate is salad

Caveira: ...

Caveira:  THATS NOT HOW THAT WORKS!!!

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*after training exercise*

Thacher:  Caveira, can you please pick up the trash around the training course?

Caveira:  Eh, sure

Thatcher: ...

Thatcher:  CAVEIRA PUT Y/N DOWN!!!!

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Y/N:  I have the urge to do something stupid

Caveira:  I'm stupid!  Do me!

Y/N:  Cav, you're like the smartest person I know-

Y/N: ...

Y/N:  HOLD THE FUCK UP!!!!!!

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Caveira:  Ugh, Y/N can be very annoying sometimes

Ash:  You know what, fuck him

Caveira: ...

Caveira:  I've been trying

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Y/N:  Cav, can you stop growling?  I'm trying to focus on this

Caveira:  I'm not growling that's how I breathe

Y/N:  Well...then stop breathing!

Caveira: ....

Caveira:  Did you just indirectly ask me to die?

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