Alone

Chapter 48

greyson's pov

The car was empty as we walked up to it, Jacob was nowhere in sight which only added on to our mountain of problems. Caleb pulled on the car handle to find it locked.

Almost immediately, Jacob's head popped up out of nowhere and scared the ever living shit out of us. A terrified expression on his face.

He unlocked the car and jumped out, breathing heavily. "Where the fuck were the both of you? Some junkies came here to get high and messed around with the car which was why I was hiding. Fucking almost gave me a heart attack." Jacob rambled on.

"Can we get in the damn car and get the fuck out of here?" Caleb demanded and got into the car without actually waiting for an answer.

I wholeheartedly agreed. I fucking hated this place and Jacob seemed to be on the same page too as he got into the car without another word.

Tense silence shrouded us as I pulled out of the driveway and sped out of that place.

Endless thoughts and different emotions flooded my head as I tried to make sense of what just transpired. We finally had a lead, however small or unhelpful it may be, at least it was something.

I needed to call Christian and give him the address, maybe he could pinpoint it to a specific location.

I had to find her.

Jacob broke the silence, questioning us on whether we found anything that would help us. Caleb told him about the address and mentioned nothing more. I got out my phone and asked Caleb to send Christian the address. The sooner the fucking better.

The ache in my chest grew with every passing second and spread to every muscle in my body. My knuckles turned white at how tight I was clutching the steering wheel.

I forced myself to keep my eyes on the road, but the road in front of me grew hazy. My foot pressed down on the accelerator, unconsciously as I tried to get a hold of myself.

All of this was my fault, though; I ruined everything and everyone around me. I deserved to live a miserable life and eventually die alone.

I was so selfish to think that she would maybe stay with me after all everything I've put her through. Hell, even I couldn't live with myself.

I vaguely feel someone shake me, trying to pull me out, but I was in too deep. I couldn't stop.

I pushed the accelerator all the way down, trees zooming past me, barely visible now.

"Greyson!" Jacob yelled loudly from behind me. "Pull over right now!"

Through my daze, I pulled over on the side of the road. My hands still clutching the wheel using it as an anchor, my heavy breathing disturbed the silence.

"Greyson, are you okay man?" Caleb asked gently, not fazed one bit at what just happened or maybe he was just good at hiding it.

I looked at him; his face was devoid of any pity or judgement, like he understood what I was going through.

Nobody ever understood what I was going through.

"Greyson, why don't you let me drive?" He asked when I didn't answer, but didn't make a move to do anything.

"No... I need her. I n-need Eli. This is all my fault; she doesn't deserve this." The ache in my chest almost unbearable now. Black dots spotted my vision as I fought hard to keep my eyes open, but I couldn't do it anymore.

I could see Eli and she was smiling at me. An extreme contrast at how I saw her last time, her tear stained cheeks and red eyes tearing apart my heart and soul at the pain that I caused her.

That same smile never failed to make my fractured heart skip a beat. She looked like an angel, bright light radiating from her that was blinding, but somehow I could still see her. She held out her hand, waiting for me to take it.

Without hesitation, I lifted my hand to meet hers, her smile widening as I reached out to her. But just as I was about to touch her fingertips, I was pulled back and everything shattered around me.

Through all the chaos, she still managed to capture my attention with her presence. She still managed to make me happy as everything fell to pieces. With that thought, I closed my eyes and with a smile on my face, I gave into the darkness.

____________________

I opened my eyes to darkness. My body felt sore and a headache greeted me. I felt around me and realized I was on my bed.

Everything came back to me all at once, Eli getting kidnapped, Tobias and Thorn, the address. I hoped Christian had found something useful from that address.

Getting up from the bed swiftly, anything that wasn't Eli was forgotten for the moment. I walked into my living room to see Jacob laying on the couch, and he had helped himself to some snacks while Caleb had his gaze on the TV, but he seemed to be thinking about something else. 

"Did Christian call?"

They had a stunned expression on their faces as if they didn't expect me to wake up anytime soon.

"Greyson, you need to rest. You literally had a panic attack and passed out." Jacob said softly.

"No. I can't fucking rest when that bastard has Eli and we have no fucking clue where she could be." I lashed out at him. 

I instantly regretted it and the surprised look on their faces didn't help. They didn't deserve my frustration taken out on them when they were in the same boat as me. Sighing, I sat down on the couch with my head in my hands.

"I'm sorry." My voice coming out in a weak whisper.

"It's okay. I get it."

"Did Christian find anything?" I asked, desperate for anything at this point.

"He has to narrow down the address to where she's most likely taken, assuming he's taken here there which is a big 'if'. Going on a wild-goose chase would just be foolish. Believe me, I would have been out the door a long time ago, but we have no idea where she is except for that scrap of paper." Caleb clarified.

Running my hands through my hair, I tugged on the strands to feel the pain, in an attempt to dull down the despair that was drowning me.

"Greyson..." He said hesitantly and when he didn't continue further, I glanced at him to see an uncertain expression plastered on his face. "You said something before you passed out. Something about this situation being your fault and that Lizzy didn't deserve it?"

I would have guessed that she had already told them about everything that happened, but they were being extremely civil upto this point which was something that I would not expect from them if they knew.

A small sigh left my lips, "I fucked up real bad. I promised her that I would keep her safe, but I failed."

"Greyson, it's not your fault. You couldn't have known."

I fucking hated that they were trying to console me. They shouldn't, not after everything I've done.

"But it fucking is." I snapped, frustrated with everything that was happening. "I was sent by her father to watch her."

Dark silence followed. My head remained bowed with the shame and regret that coursed through me.

"The fuck you just said?" Jacob questioned.

"I used to work for her father, but that was before I knew anything about her. After that, everything changed. I tried so hard to come clean, but I was a coward. I couldn't do it. I didn't want to lose the only good thing in my life and I fucking hate myself every second for doing that to her."

Their faces betrayed no emotions as they processed what I was saying. I remained silent not knowing what to say. There was nothing I could say.

The tension in the room was cut by the shrill ringtone of Caleb's cellphone. He checked his phone to see the caller ID and his body tensed up.

"It's Christian."