Alone

Chapter 16

I awoke with an aching head in the dead of the night, moonlight shone in through the window. I was on my bed covered with my blanket. I must have passed out from exhaustion because I don't remember coming to bed, one of them probably carried me to bed. It was almost three o'clock; I let out a groan before burying my head in the pillow.

Out of nowhere, I was smacked on the back of my head. The arm slid off my head and fell onto the bed. A disheveled Jacob had rolled over and hit me in the process. He had his mouth open with a little bit of drool coming out. At least one of us is getting to sleep peacefully.

Sitting up, I stretched to loosen my muscles and made my way to the kitchen. Grabbing the same carton of juice from before, I checked to see if anyone was disturbed because I wasn't exactly being quiet. I was too lazy to get a glass, so I just drank straight from the carton. It was mine after all.

"You little hypocrite." 

I spit out whatever I had in my mouth in the sink, the sudden scare had my heart in my mouth. Caleb was standing at the entrance of the kitchen, leaning on the wall and looking at me with an amused expression on his face.

"You scared the shit out of me." I said, placing my hand on my racing heart. "What the fuck are you doing standing in the dark like a creep?"

He was still sporting that smug smile. "I couldn't sleep."

"So you thought standing in the dark was better?" I retorted. "Don't tell me when everyone's asleep; you stand over them and stare like a creep?" I jokingly asked.

He ignored me and got out a glass, poured some juice for himself and took a sip, "This is how normal human beings drink." He spoke like he was teaching a child.

I gave him the stink-eye and diverted the conversation, "Why can't you sleep?"

"I had a lot on my mind."

They were always worried about me, which is why I was hesitant in telling them. I have a lot of baggage, and I couldn't seem to get rid of it, no matter how much I try. I didn't want to burden anyone by telling them and most of all, I did not want their pity. Even though I struggled with myself at times, I knew that I was strong enough to push through it even if it took everything from me. I had to trust in my ability to get through it.

"Stop worrying. I'm already over it, just like you said, I needed to tell someone and let it out." I gave him a small smile in hopes of convincing him. "Christian's not the reason I got my panic attacks and nightmare, there's a lot that happened after he left. I don't think I'm ready to talk about that just yet, though." Caleb nodded in understanding, and that's all I needed.

"Elizabeth, I know I sound like a broken record, but whenever you're ready, we're here."

"Thank you." I mumbled, my heart felt heavy.

"We know you're hurting, Lizzy. We hate that you're going through it all alone. We felt so fucking helpless the first time we had to help you through your panic attacks and nightmares, so just talk to one of us. Nothing about your past is going to change who you are to us. We aren't going to judge nor are you going to lose us." He reassured me.

"Thank you for caring." I said with a teary-eyed smile.

"Okay." He said, clapping his hands. "Onto the juicy stuff." Jacob was rubbing off on him.

"Is this some kind of interrogation?" I asked with a smile.

"It's whatever you want it to be. What's deal with you and Greyson?" He asked with raised eyebrows.