Motheaten Memories [Yandere Prince x Enemy Princess Reader]

30. Decisions.

Y/N sat bolt upright in bed. Her eyes were wide as she stared around her darkened chambers within Ficcioro Palace. Her whole body was covered in a fine layer of sweat and she shivered as she thought about her dream. "How-how could I have forgotten all of that?" She gasped, tears coming to her eyes. "Are all of my memories from then just as warped as what I thought that one was?!" She was horrified, by the circumstances that she had only just remembered. 

I can't believe my father said those things to me! She thought, feeling her stomach twist in nausea as her older years cast new light on things that she had missed as a child. The Queen was right, he really was sick!

She started crying, torn between disgust and disappointment. The man she had idolized ever since her kingdom fell was not worthy of her respect our his crown. Has everything I've been fighting to avenge this whole time been just as terrible as my father? Did my father deserve what happened to him?

Her body shook with sobs as despondency gripped her as she looked down at her wrist where the bracelet from her father still sat. For all these years I held onto this bracelet, it reminded me of who I was and all I had lost, now it makes me sick! Filled with revulsion she tore it from her wrist and flung it across the room.

Looking down at her bare wrist she saw to her disgust that the butterfly of the bracelet was still branded into her skin from the fires that scorched the capital. She sobbed harder as she realized that mark couldn't be done away with as easy as the bracelet that had created it, it would be with Y/N for the rest of her life.

She curled up into a tiny ball beneath the blankets and continued to cry. She wasn't sure what to do anymore, the revenge that had once seemed so obvious was crumbling before her very eyes. She no longer knew if her family deserved to be avenged, or even if she deserved to survive that night ten years ago.

. . .

Y/N spent the following day in a daze, she was still trying to process her memories as more had come flooding in throughout the day although none of them were nearly as obviously wrong as the one from the previous night. It didn't help that she had gotten very little sleep as well.

Everything was a blur and before she knew it, it was night again and she was standing in the courtyard facing Törrsk. He had continued training her at least three nights a week, she thought that some physical activity would take her mind off her troubles but her troubles only impaired her ability to properly apply what she had learned.

After Törrsk had successfully knocked her down from her guarded stance for the fifth time in a row, which was unusual given that she was generally hard to knock off her feet now, he knew that something was up. "Y/N, ya've been quiet, vhat's vrong?" He asked as he helped her off the ground for the fifth time.

"Nothing..." She said, not wanting to reveal what was bothering her.

Trörrsk just kept staring at her blankly, not even pretending to buy her lie until she eventually relented. "Alright, I'll tell you," she sighed. "I spoke with the Queen of Luccia and she told me some stuff about my father that wasn't so great, I hoped she was lying, but last night I remembered some things about him myself."

"So vhat?" Törrsk tilted his head, confused why Y/N was so upset. "He vas only ever a man, vhat did you expect?"

"But he wasn't," Y/N shot back, her shoulders slumping as she looked at the ground. "He was someone who should have been better than this..."

"Yes, he vas a..." The slave clucked his tongue as he tried to remember what her father had been called. "Vhat vord was it? Kyng?"

"Shhh!" Y/N hissed, alarm flaring in her heart as she quickly covered his mouth with her hand looking around to see if there was anyone who could have overhead, thankfully there was no one. "He was but you can't say it out loud, understand?" She reprimanded him in a whisper.

Törrsk could only nod, stood there, stunned by Y/N's hand over his mouth. "Vhat I don't understand is vhy knowledge that he had flaws upsets ya?" He asked several moments after she finally removed her hand.

"Well, I've looked up to him for years. Whenever I felt uncertain I would just think of him, of what was done to him and my mother and it would give me the strength to continue on. I wanted to avenge him," Y/N whispered her response, a bad taste filling her mouth as she thought about the kind of man her father actually was. "But now, I don't think he's the kind of man who deserves it..."

"Do ya vant vengeance only because of vhat happened to yar father?" He asked another question.

"No, I also want it for my mother, and everyone who worked in the castle," Y/N replied quickly thinking of everything that had been destroyed and all the lives that had been lost. "All of my people and my nation."

"And vas yar mother good?" Törrsk continued to question her in an unusually gentle tone.

"Yes, of course!" She replied her mother had been nothing but kind to her, and she was beginning to realize had even done her best to protect her from her father.

"And yar people, vere they good?" He continued.

"All of them that I knew were," Y/N said, smiling nostalgically as she recalled all of the fond memories she had of the people she had met.

"Then think of it as their vengeance yar getting, not yar father's," Törrsk's blue eyes were serious and they glinted as brightly as the stars above them as he spoke.

"You're right..." Y/N said, her inner turmoil dissipating the more she reflected on his words. "Thank you Törrsk," she gave him a grateful smile before she returned to her reflections. It doesn't matter whether my father deserved what he got, because thousands of people didn't and suffered the same. And I will avenge them, it is my duty.

A/N

Looks like Y/N has found a new motivation for her vengeance.

Until next time I'll see you on the other side.

~J. C. Coltt.~