__I'm sorry in advance..__
"Derek, can we talk tonight when we're home?" "Yeah of course, is something wrong?" he asks me. "No no, it's good." "Okay, can't wait, see you tonight!"
I walk out of this office and get back to my work. I'm pregnant, about 2 years ago I had a miscarriage and there would be a small change I could get pregnant again.
But I am, and tonight I am about to tell Derek. If I'm right about this he will be thrilled. I'm happy, never been this happy but scared.
What if I screw up again. A lot can happen. I already made an appointment with an OB to check my due date and if everything is still alright.
There are two hours left at work. I do my consults and finish some charts.
The two hours are over faster then expected. Derek is waiting for me in the lobby so I go to the residence lounge and change. I walk up to him and he has a smile on his face.
"Hi beautiful.. how was your day?" "Hi, my day was okay. Did the usual things." "Oh okay. Good. Let's go home!" "Yes" I say cheerful.
"You look happy?" "I am. I have news remember." "Oh right!"
When we arrive home Derek grabs some red wine and asks me if I want some.. damn.. I have to say no. "That's actually what I wanted to talk about with you." "Wine?" "No you idiot." I say laughing.
"I can't drink wine for a while." "oh- why- you aren't-?" "Pregnant?" he nods his head. "Yes. Yes I'm pregnant der." "Are you being for real??"
"Yes. I did the test this morning. I made an appointment with Conny tomorrow afternoon." "Oh my god- we're having a baby?" "We're having a baby."
He runs up to me and hugs me tight. "Are you- are you crying?" I ask him. He just nods his head. "Der...." "im just happy it's okay." "okay then.." I hug him tighter and we stand there in the middle of the livingroom for what feels like forever.
This was 9 months ago. I'm in labour now. "Derek.. I can't do this." "Yes you can Mer, just one more push and our beautiful little girl will be here with us. Okay? Let's do it together. One.. two.. push" I squeeze his hand as tight as I can and give all my energy.
Suddenly I hear screaming and people are running around. They grab a little blanket and Conny lays our beautiful girl in my arms. "Wow"
"Yeah, wow. She is beautiful Mer" Derek says.
"She is, she definitely is. Lexie Sloan Shepherd is beautiful." I say looking up into his eyes. His eyes light up at the sound of her second name.
We've been talking about Lexie but we haven't talked about her second name. "Thank you" he says whispering. I nod my head and he kisses both of us on our forehead.
The doctors leave us alone for a little and after awhile they come back to fix some things and to help us with the first change and feeding.
Maggie and Bailey come to visit but I'm tired after. I get to sleep and when I wake up in the middle of the night I see Derek swaying on the chair with Lexie in his arms.
"Hi" I say in a groggy voice. "Hi, you're awake" "I am." "She is gorgeous." "I know Derek" I say giggling.
4 months later.
Dereks mom has been staying at a hotel. She comes from morning till night to help us with Lexie.
"Derek!" "What's up?" "Can you change her real quick? Miranda is calling me." "Yeah sure. Hi lex, how are you my little girl" he says in a baby voice.
He walks away and I pick up my phone. "Hi Miranda" "hey Grey, how's everything going?" "It's going great. Thanks." "Good, that was all I was calling for, just wanted to know if everything went okay there." she said laughing.
"Oh thanks. Yeah we're doing good. Dereks mom has been helping out a lot, mostly with keeping the house clean, cooking and stuff." "Oh well, thank her for me"
"Will do, I'll see you soon." "Alright bye" "bye" I hang up and walk upstairs to Derek and Lexie.
I stand in the doorway and Derek looks up. "Hi beautiful" every time he calls me that I still blush. "Hi, how's my little girl." "She is good, was coughing a little a few minutes ago but that's over now."
"okay good! You can warm up our dinner and I'll be down in a few" "okay, it will be done in 15" he gives me a kiss and walks down stairs.
I just watch Lexie sleeping. I pick her up and lay her head in the crook of my neck. I sit in the chair for around 10 minutes.
I lay her back down and get downstairs to eat dinner. Derek is already sitting at the dining table. I grab my plate and sit next to him.
Dereks pov:
My mom arrived 10 minutes later and sits down as well. We make some small talk until I realise Lexie shouldn't be napping this long. She has to eat too.
"Mer shouldn't you grab Lexie to eat as well?" "Oh right, I'll be right back." She walks upstairs and I keep talking to my mom. "So how was today without me? Everything went okay?"
"Yeah everything went great! You can leave whenever you want mom, you shouldn't feel obligated to stay here." "I don't honey. I'm here because it's nice here and because my only son just got a baby." She says smiling.
"NOOOO" I hear Meredith scream. I look at my mom in horror. "Meredith? What's wrong?" My mom looks at me when she doesn't answer.
Instead all we hear is sobbing coming from upstairs. "Meredith!??" I run upstairs. I get into the nursery and see Meredith sitting on the ground with Lexie in her arms.
"Meredith whats wrong?" "She- she- Lexie, she-" "calm down.. what's wrong?" "She doesn't have a pulse." "what?" I ask in shock.
I feel Lexie's heartbeat and it isn't there. "MOM, CALL 911!" I scream. I wrap my arms around Meredith and she melts in my figure.
She sobs into my chest while I just let my tears flow down my cheeks. I hear my mom walk upstairs and she looks at us. "What's wrong? Why do I have to call 911?" she asks in a nervous voice at the sight of me and Mer.
"Lexie has no heartbeat." My mom looks at us in shock and she immediately dials 911 and explains the story. The ambulance is here in a few minutes. "What happened?"
"Nothing- I- I just came here to feed her but she didn't wake up, so when I picked her up and felt her pulse she didn't- she didn't have one" Meredith sobs.
They take her to the hospital. We get in the back of the ambulance. When we arrive everyone is in shock when we walk in with tear stained cheeks.
"Grey what are you doi- what's wrong?" Bailey asks when she sees me with red eyes as well.
"Lexie- she well-" "You have to call it." someone says. "NO NO NO.. MY BABY" Meredith yells. "Honey, calm down please" I say with tears streaming down my face.
"Time of death 6.47 pm" Mer falls to her knees and I hug her tight. She wants to scream but no sound comes out.
We were finally happy. We had everything we dreamed off. A beautiful little girl. Lexie Sloan Shepherd. She will never be forgotten. We'll love you forever.
__uh damn.. hope you have a good day, everyday is a new day with new possibilities. If you have any ideas for future one shots let me know. I also started writing a new book. I will publish that soon. Love y'all__
