Happiness [GakuenBabysitters]

I'll be better (Request)

Oneshot requested by dat_friend
Tw : blood, death, mental illness, angst? And suicide.

Ryuuichi's Pov

There i am standing in the middle of the street, blinding headlights piercing through my shut eyelids.
Bracing myself for the impact.

How did i get into this? Me and Hayato got into a fight, i ended up slaping him and running away tears in my eyes from his last words, from the fight

And his life..

I ran away but i din't know that he ended up following me. I ran and ran until i fell down a street.

I managed to stood up but the driver din't notice. I braced and shut my eyelids tightly.

Until i felt myself being pushed. And a loud crashing noise came ringing in my ears.

I opened my eyes to see a figure lying down on the street, red all over it.
"H-haya-to?"

It was him.
"No-no-no-no!"

There i sat beside his lifeless body, long gone to the world up, beyond the stars.
Why did it have to be him? It should have been me..

I cried myself to sleep that night after taking him to the hospital, the doctors said that there's nothing that we can do and he's long gone.

Hayato is long gone.

Its been about a month since, hayato's death. A month of me skipping work and repeatedly telling everyone that asks the same news. His mom, brother and everyone.

Everytime i hung someone up on the phone, i felt my chest hurt and my stomach churning.
Why? Why did you do that? I was supposed to be the one.

I couldn't take anymore of it and just screamed out my frustration.
I started seing black, i started hearing things, i started seing things, i started hallucinating may that be hearing or seeing.
"Fuck! I was supposed to die then!"

"Yeah.. You were"

"H-hayato?"

"You were supposed to die Ryuu.. You idiot"

His voice is in my head, he's haunting me.

I look behind me to see him my eyes widened at the sight and i couldn't help but walk closer to him.

"Don't come close to me"

"Im sorry.." I look down

"You were supposed to be in my place, you were supposed to die Ryuu! I hate you, i hate this i've wasted my life for someone like you!"

"N-no! Your not Hayato, he would never say that to me!"

"Im Hayato! And I wasted my life for a piece of crap like you, im not supposed to be here! Im supposed to live my life to the fullest not be dead!"
"I hate you ryuu!"

"St-stop! Stop it stop talking!" i screamed I covered my ears and knelt down my head was spinning from hearing all of this, i know im guilty i know that all, i know im supposed to die.  I screamed my lungs out, i couldn't take it anymore