Hopelessly Devoted ☆ Pierre Gasly

XXX

What should have been a restful night for Juliette, turned into a restless night. It started when she went to bed; she had work stress and nerves for the free practices on Friday. It was tossing and turning in bed. When she finally fell asleep after three hours, she woke up after having a bad dream, and since that moment, she didn't close her eyes anymore.

Juliette changed in her work clothes and made herself ready to go. It was tough to act like nothing was going on, but there was. She could feel there was a panic or anxiety attack on its way. Which of those two, wasn't clear yet. The decision was made to skip breakfast, she wasn't stable to show up at breakfast.

Fragments of her dream kept flashing infant of her eyes; the image of the concerning looks on the faces of her colleagues, Lewis, who was shouting over the radio how bad it looked, the silence... Pierre had a massive crash in her dream. A crash that took his life. It felt so real that she even felt the panic, the pain and the tears on her cheeks. All she said in the dream was: "I just got him back, and I lost him too."

Juliette laid down on the hotel bed and placed her hand on her heart; it was beating like crazy. She deeply inhaled by her nose and blew the air out by her mouth. Everything was shaking: her breath, her limbs, it even felt like her heart was shaking. Laying down made the situation even worse. Juliette sat up and looked at her hands, she couldn't keep them still. Her eyes closed and she breathed in again, and out. Nothing was helping.

It had been a while since the last time Juliette felt like this, and it didn't just stop; she wanted it to stop. Juliette got up and started to walk around in her hotel room like there was a hurricane inside her. She was moving like her brain was demanding an athlete's energetic expenditure, but won't tell her limbs what to do. Yet somehow, Juliette managed to walk around. Walking around made the feeling of the shaking limbs, of her heart, less fierce - at least, that was how Juliette saw it. It didn't get less, it didn't get worse, it stayed the same. But for the thoughts, it was acceptable, it was a distraction.

Juliette was snapping her knuckles, it slightly hurt because she was forcing it. She never snapped her knuckles, unless she was stressed. Words flew over her lips. Talking like she didn't have enough time to say what she wanted to. Her words were crowded together, words were probably missing. A few tears streamed down her face, it was barely noticeable.

The hotel door flew open, and a few people stormed into the room. Juliette looked up, and her lips parted; she looked lost at Toto, Peter and Delilah. She put both her hands on her head and stopped walking. Her eyes were scanning the people; more people were standing in the hallway.

"Jesus Christ, Julie, what's wrong?" Delilah asked right away and looked worried at Juliette.

Juliette turned away from them, walking towards the window. She covered her face with her hands and shook her head.

"Juliette," Peter said sternly. "What's going on?"

It was like the words didn't get filtered. Juliette could hear them talk, but she couldn't form phrases from it. She sat down on the couch and tried to find an okay position to sit. That wasn't the case, it even annoyed her more. She got up again and started to walk again.

Peter placed his hands on his hips and looked at Toto; he didn't know what to do, and he couldn't afford this situation now. They had an important race coming up, they couldn't work with one less. Even though it was a private situation, Peter only could think of the race. Everyone was having much stress and a lot of pressure. Peter sighed and rubbed his forehead, there was no chance now. "I'm going to see what I can do with the board," he mentioned and walked back to the hallway. Delilah followed him outside.

"What is going on, Juliette?" Toto asked. "And start talking, please."

The eyes of Juliette shot up to Toto's eyes; he was talking on a forcing tone, and she knew she couldn't stay silent now. "I..." Her breath was shaking.