Proving You Wrong

Needed to Say

Sorry this isn't an update but something I need to say, you can skip this if you like, but it would mean the world to me if you read every last word of what I'm about to vent.

The picture above is from a couple days ago. I found out about this last night when talking to my mom over the phone while she's in Florida.

I know the Kitchen family personally and have for about three-ish years now. We've always been close because they took classes at my parents martial arts school. Their three year old daughter is one of the kindest, free spirits I know. All of the brothers look out for her and will for many years to come. The youngest brother, Blake, though he got on my nerves, was one the sweetest, cutest, little boys I've ever met. Quite a charmer, if I do say so.

The middle brother, Preston, is the exact same way. Only difference being, he's had a crush on me practically since the day we met. I kid you not, this boy would've taken a bullet if I'd asked him too. We never dated because I was always interested in some one else, but he is probably the best guy to have ever liked me, even if he's a year younger. I guess I didn't see that then, but my friend Mae who liked him, did. I'd probably still never date him, but out of all people, I'm glad he liked me. I felt bad for Mae though, because she knew it, and he knew she liked him. I was just glad our "love triangle" never got in the way of our friendship. Okay that's a little off topic.

The eldest, Andrew, I didn't know as well, but he was always cracking jokes and having fun. No matter the situation. He actually dated my best friend from a few years back, and is such a cutie. (I don't care if he's two years older, I'll still call him a cutie cause we're friends.)

The mother, Destiny, was a single mother who is now engaged and last time I talked to them, was going back to school. I babysat her kids, except the eldest, and helped her with her college algebra. Such a beautiful, amazing mother and one of the best, besides my own. She was like an extra mom to me and I don't know how she managed four wild, but amazing children with the help of only her fiancée.

Apparently Preston had been bullied because he was tall and skinny, and played football and violin. These bullies were all bigger and weighed more, even though they were in the same grade. They would trip him in gym, spill food on him, crush his phone, call him a fag, and multiple other horrid things.

That I did not know until now.

He didn't even receive the worst end of it.

Blake, who was diagnosed with Aspergers, a part of the Autism spectrum that that both my brothers have as well, was beaten by the this same boy.

Being partially autistic, Blake liked routine. He sat in the same place at breakfast and lunch everyday and had placed his stuff their before grabbing his meal. When returning, he noticed a boy sitting in his seat and his things were removed. After asking the boy to move the bully stepped in and told him that the boy didn't need to.

Blake replied, "it's none of your business."
After being asked to repeat that by the same boy who had been bullying his older brother, Blake did. He said it again and all he remembers before blacking out is that his head was being slammed into the table. Even though the two hundred pound eighth grader had already knocked 6th grader Blake, out, he continued to punch and body slam the limp boy. Hospitalizing him for five days with a broken jaw, fractured skull, possible brain damage, and loss of hearing from an ear fracture.

Why someone would bully in the first place is beyond me, but why a kid would go this far, leaves me speechless. I have lost almost all hope on humanity and our species.

What kind of parents raise this child? More importantly, what kind of principle allows this to continue after the mother had sent an official letter to the school regarding the matter, over a month ago. Nothing was done about it. No precautions were taken to protect these children and Preston clearly stated that he didn't think there would be, even though Destiny had told the principal in the letter that she feared for their safety.

I am so saddened and beyond angry for these reasons that I'm sitting in a pool of my own tears writing this and watching new clips of it and my heart goes out to their family. I am hoping to soon get back in contact with them and hopefully talk to them all about the situation. This beautiful family doesn't deserve this, no one does. So why did it happen.

I'm a strong believer that everything happens for a reason. Maybe this was to open our eyes that even though we may not be going through it or some one we know, but it still is. It happens every day and it's not going away.

Honestly, I don't think it ever will. But we can help that. Each and every one of you can do something. Make a change. Help someone out. Change their lives. Save their life.

Being a victim of bullying myself off and on in third through the beginning of eighth grade, I know what it's like. Feeling alone. Being neglected. Like no ones there for you. Girls talked behind my back, and they would laugh about it in my face. They didn't care if I knew. Why would they? It was happening to them. They said I tried too hard to fit in, but wouldn't you if you never fit in anywhere else? By the time the end of first quarter of eighth grade came around, i'd had enough. I was tired of people talking about me. Being made fun of. Being rejected. Tossed from friend group to friend group like I was a piece of trash no one wanted. I lost faith and I didn't want to look at myself because every time I did I heard their voices in my head and I just wanted it a to go away.

"Ugly."
"Repulsive."
"There's no room here, I guess you'll have to sit by yourself."
"No one likes you, I don't see why you sit with us anyway."

At that point I had no friends. No one to talk to. At least no one that I thought would understand. I wanted to die. End it all I didn't think people would miss me anyway. I was a nobody.

If I wasn't afraid of pain, I probably would have done it. I had the resources, considering my entire family is martial artists. The only reason other than that, that made me not do it, just end it all, was the voice in the back of my head. My voice.

That voice told me to stay strong. Suck it up. Keep it inside and although I felt like I might explode, it was better. I had to stay strong. Stay alive. For me. For my family who was going through worse. My mom had just beaten colon cancer. My brother had beaten depression. We overcame all our money problems from not only my mom's medical bills but my brother's who had broken his leg severely.

I was the rock. I never broke down. I felt like it was my job. I kept it all inside, and until this very day, I haven't told a soul about any of this. Not parents, nor my best friends.

So next time someone is annoying you and you want to say something mean. Don't. Find an alternative. be nice. I can not stress that enough. Just be kind to your peers. to everyone around because you never know when you'll push someone over the edge.

Sit next to the girl that's always alone. Start a convo with the boy who never talks. It could change lives. Theirs and yours.

Weather someone having their life taken from them, or taking it themselves. It leaves a mark on everyone in their path. And that path just stops dead in its tracks and fades away.

Thank you for letting me vent and I hope you take everything I said to heart. Although there is so much more I could say, there is such little time to say it. Every day could be your last. Live it good. And make it count. Make some one else's day, even if yours isn't going the best.

It's always calm in the eye of a hurricane. And as a favorite singer of mine said, "sometimes, it all gets a little too much. But you gotta realize that soon the fog will clear up. And you don't have to be afraid because we're all the same."

~ Laklynn

Remember, I will always love you, no matter who you are, what you look like, or how old you are.