Under the Night Sky

Chapter 45

"Congratulations, you're cleared to go," Meredith smiled at Helen passing her CT scans into her hands.

"That's wonderful to hear, thank you, Dr. Grey," a nurse sighed gratefully. Somehow Meredith suspected the relief was not due to the medical personnel's concern about Helen's health, more like everyone was happy to see the problematic patient go. Dr. Crawford was a real pain in the ass for doctors and nurses for the few weeks of her convalescence.

Helen's smile widened as she studied the images herself, her eyes glimmering slightly.

"Dr. Crawford will probably stay for the lunch, we still need to get the discharge papers ready," Meredith told the nurse who nodded and took off from the room, probably thanking god in high heavens that it would be Helen's last meal at the hospital.

Helen leaned back on the bed closing her eyes tightly. Meredith sat down wordlessly at the edge of her bed and grasped her hand.

"I am free... I am finally free..." she whispered, her voice breaking. "I knew the operation was a success but now I'm being discharged and it's real..."

"It is," Meredith smiled gently. "So what now?"

"Now... lots of work is waiting for me."

"Work? Leaving aside the fact that you're not allowed to work yet, what about the plans to spend the rest of your life lying on a beach?"

"Well, I thought I had two years at the most ahead of me, now I know I have a lifetime. I'd get sunburnt," she quipped. "And, as you put it, I'd piss away my savings all too quickly. And I am a surgery junkie. Couldn't live without it, pun intended."

"Have you booked the plane tickets?" Meredith asked quietly.

"Yes, for Wednesday."

"You'll stay with me until then, right?"

"Somehow I doubt all the hot boys at Las Vegas hotels would find my bald self attractive, so yeah, you're stuck with me," she rolled her eyes with exaggeration.

"Good, the house is too quiet for my liking, I'd do with some company," Meredith smiled gently.

"Methinks you miss a certain cocky brain surgeon," Helen trailed off suggestively.

Meredith burst out in laughter. "I'm sorry," she choked out. "It's just that... it's truer than you think. I miss Derek; I've been all over the place for the last few days. But... I kinda miss my former self. I hate that I do, but bitch Meredith used to have no regards for feelings of others and she wasn't an emotional lovesick puppy. Until they came along, first Mitch and then Derek."

"Oh, you're doing an injustice to Derek, putting him in the same sentence with the asshole," Helen shook her head chastising her. "And sorry to break your bubble, you were never that much of a pathological bitch, as much as you keep telling yourself that just to feel stronger. Maybe... you could come with me to New York? Just for a few days?"

"No," Meredith said firmly. "I can't, not even for Derek. I know I'm selfish but... I can't, Helen."

"You're not selfish," Helen tightened the grasp on her hand. "You're just not ready. I get it, Derek gets it."

"I... hope so..." Meredith sighed, tucking her hair behind her ears.

"What are you not telling me?" Helen asked at once. "Something happened, did you and Derek have a fight?"

"No, we didn't... Helen," Meredith looked straight into her eyes. "Will you... Can you... keep an eye on him? You have to meet with him for a follow-up anyway."

"What are you talking about? Keep an eye on him? Like check if he's cheating? Mer, I really don't-"

"No, I don't think he's cheating," Meredith assured her quickly. "That's not the thing... I'm just... I'm worried about him. He's really taking a plunge and I don't think he fully realizes it."