My Best Mates Sister

24.

Rosie

"Are you in love with me?" He questions and my mind can't process the question. Am I in love with Charles? My mind races through all of our times together and my heart swells and I know the answer but I can't tell him "I love you as my best friend Charles" I say my own heartbreaking as I say the words "oh, I understand" he comments and I can see the heartbreak on his face and I can't help myself "actually that was a complete lie, I am completely in love with you" I blurt out and his whole face lights up "really?" I nod my head but I know what I'm going to say next is going to hurt him "but I need to make this work with Lando, Jules deserves it" he instantly frowns "what?" I feel the tears again "I can't not try" he grabs my hands "Rosie, look how upset you are, this can't be the right decision if it doesn't make you happy" I know what he is saying is right "my life isn't about just me anymore" I say and he shakes his head "I will love her like she is my own, she would never go without" he pleads with me and I know deep down he would be incredible but Lando won't try to be her father without me. "He already thinks she isn't his" i mutter "then he doesn't deserve either of you! Rosie I'm so in love with you" he tells me and leans in to kiss me but I pull away "I can't treat Lando the way he treated me" I explain seeing his hurt expression "so you want to kiss me?" My head nods "more than you could understand Charles" he grins "Rosie let us be happy, together! All 4 of us will be miserable if things continue how they are" he tells me and my resolve breaks "he doesn't make me happy like you Charles, I don't trust him and how can you love without trust?" He pulls me into his arms "I didn't stop you the first time but I'm not losing you again" he tells me and I rest my head against his chest "I need to talk to Lando" I say and pull away "I'm going to stay with George tonight" I say and he grabs my hand "you can stay here, I promise nothing will happen" he assures me "okay, but no funny business"

The next morning I wake up in a panic, it's race day! What's the time? I look around everywhere for my phone and spot it on the counter. The time flashes up saying 5.30 but Charles isn't anywhere to be seen. It's only then that I clock the sound of the shower switching off in the background. My heart races as I hear the bathroom door open "Mon ange?" He is stood topless with water dripping down his chest and I feel my palms get sweaty as my mouth goes dry. I cough to clear my throat "hey, I need to get going" he frowns "I've messaged George to bring you a team shirt" he explains and my heart flutters at the gesture "oh, cool" he smiles "bathroom is all yours" he tells me and I have to resist every urge not to run my hands over his chest. I need to speak to Lando, he can't be happy either.

Me and George went into the paddock together, he had already questioned why I was with Charles but he understood once I told him about mine and Lando's argument. "It's weird that you won't be here next race, I will still expect your voice over the radio" George tells me as we enter the garage "imagine how weird it's going to be for me watching from race control" he grins "not gone for good just yet!" He jokes and he heads over to the car. I take my usual seat next to Marcus "can't believe this is the last race with you for a while" he comments as I open the strategy notes "I know! It's a bit crazy" I reply giving him a smile.

It was Hamilton rather than Leclerc who made the better start off the front row. But Leclerc thought quickly, moving right to crowd Hamilton as his Ferrari SF90 got going properly. Leclerc thus held the lead through Turn 1, as Bottas briefly nipped past his team mate for second before Hamilton slid back around the outside to reclaim the position. Hulkenberg cheekily, and briefly, took Vettel for fourth, before Vettel DRSed back past him down the main straight. At the back, Verstappen from 19th on the grid was forced into the Turn 1 run-off after appearing to misjudge the concertina effect into the first bend, damaging his front wing and coming in immediately for a new one. As the race settled down in the first few laps, barring some brief excitement when Red Bull's Alex Albon tried to fight his way past McLaren's Carlos Sainz only to be dumped unceremoniously off at the first Lesmo, Vettel was holding a comfortable fourth when he dropped his car on his own at Ascari. "Head down George there has been an incident ahead" I let George know as I watch the action unfold.

The race then burst into life following the first round of pit stops, with the hard tyre-shod Leclerc emerging on Lap 21 just in front of Hamilton's medium-tyred Mercedes. Hamilton was sharking behind the Ferrari driver, and as they approached the second chicane two laps later, Leclerc firmly cut to the right of the track, forcing an irate Hamilton onto the run-off and earning himself a black and white driving standards flag. What it meant, though, was that Leclerc held on the lead – but it was far from a comfortable one. Lap 36 saw an apparently-rattled Leclerc scamper across the Turn 1 run-off area. Hamilton was applying pressure – but unfortunately for him, the five-time champion was also starting to struggle on his medium tyres. "Currently P9 George with Gasly behind" I update him "how many seconds" I look at the live telemetry "6.9 your tires are 4 laps fresher, don't take any risks" I say as George starts pushing. My eyes are locked on Charles who is still managing to hold off Hamilton when a rare mistake from Hamilton locking the brakes at Turn 1 and run through the bollards, allowing Bottas – who'd been eating into the gap to the leading pair at a vast rate of knots since his Lap 27 pit stop – into second. My heart started to race, could he win back to back races? In front of the Tifosi so less?

It was a tense few final laps as Gasly closed in on George but he managed to cross the line in 9th. "HE WON IN SPA, HE WINS IN MONZA" Crofty yells out through the TV set up in the garage and my heart swells with pride. "Okay George Strat mode 3, try to conserve fuel! That's P9! Well done" I say following the usual race ending procedures "thanks Rose, couldn't do it without you! I'm going to really miss you and I'm so grateful for how much you have helped me over the season so far" I start to feel emotional "of course, there is no one else I want to see succeed as much as I want you too" I say "Rosie! Can I also just say how proud I am of you, I'm so looking forward to being an uncle! Meeting Juliette will be one of the best days of my life" he tells me and I can't keep the grin off of my face "Thanks George, now remember to switch off and pop the steering wheel back on" I comment.

What a day! What a race! I had almost forgot about the talk I need to have with Lando when I spot him lingering at the front of the garage. "See you guys later" I tell the gang as we are going out for drinks to celebrate my last day. I walk over "Hi" I mumble "can we talk?" I nod and follow him out of the garage into the pit-lane before we headed onto the track "I'm sorry about yesterday, I was out of line" my stomach drops "it's okay Lando, I think we both know this isn't working" he frowns "it really isn't! But I don't want to lose you Rosie" I shake my head "you already did, we are trying to fix something that is already too broken" I say and he frowns "is it Charles?" Part of me wants to protect his feelings "well, I think we were doomed from the beginning of this" his eyebrows raise "you think?" I nod my head sadly "I haven't felt right since we tried again and I think I'm just waiting for the penny to drop" he nods "I get that but I can't do any of this without you" he explains "we can do this together but we can't be together Lando" his expression turns angry "I told you I didn't want this, I thought I could do this with you but without you I don't want to do any of it" he snaps at me. We have reached parabolica and I know I have to finish this track walk with him "well Lando at the end of the day it's your decision if you want to be in Juliette's life" he stops walking and turns to look at me "Juliette?" Ah crap I hadn't told him "yeah I've decided she will be called Juliette Athena Russell" his expression softens "Jules and Anthonie, I get it" I nod my head feeling tears drip down my face. "We aren't the same people Lando, too much damage has been done" he nods "I can't be her dad, I'm sorry Rosie" I understand but I am completely disappointed "that's your choice Lando, but I won't let you change your mind" he swallows nervously "I need to focus on my career and I can't do that if I'm looking after her alone" I shake my head "I just hope you don't regret it Lando" I say as we reach the pit-lane once more.

Lando headed to McLaren awkwardly and I decided to look for Charles. I know he will be a busy man as he as won the Italian GP as a Ferrari driver! It doesn't get much better than that. I feel deflated though, I don't want to ruin his day with my bad mood. I change my mind and head straight for the hotel. My phone rings and I see Charles flash on my screen so I answer "congratulations superstar" I say "thanks mon amour! I tried to find you but George said you left with Lando?" He sounds hurt "we walked the track to talk" just like me and him did on Friday "oh?" I know he is wanting more information "it's over, we are over and he doesn't want to be Jules dad" i mutter sadly "oh mon amour, I'm sorry!" I shake my head before realising he can't see me "please don't be, I'm going to go as I need to get ready to meet the gang" I explain "come back to mine later?" I think for a second "okay"